hating_yourself homicidal_lunatic@hotmail.com is such an annoying feeling. cause its not my fault i was brought up like this - all i know is that its making me miserable....right about now. and its pissing me off too...why do i always care so much what people think? why cant i just be myself - and say fuck you if you dont like it? because i was fucking brought up to make sure that i always make everyone as happy as i can. its stupid - it really is. and im bloody pissed off right now. i seriously am. but im not gonna do anything about it. well, except for blathing ofcourse, but that doesnt really solve the problem, now does it? gah. confrontations. fights. =( i wanna sleep. 030204 ... Aimee is sometimes the only thing you have left.... 030204 ... mo easy to hide, but impossible to get over 030204 ... x something i can honestly say i don't do anymore 030205 ... unhinged i don't know if i hate myself so much as i hate my life. everything always ends up the same way. which i guess is my fault. i have a habit of blaming myself for everything. and i have a habit of not being able to talk to people i really care about when things start to go wrong. i have told the truth only to be left alone too many times. i knew i should have never said those things to him. it wasn't like he was the first one i had ever said those things to. i thought we were strong enough. i guess i was wrong. again. even when things appear to be their strongest they could always easily break 030205 ... ferret her life is like a mirror only reflecting everyone else's thoughts. but once the mirror broke, she picked up the pieces and starting cutting. She wouldn't stop until she had wasted away all the pieces, but then she realized that once the used all the pieces, there would be nothing left, so then i stepped in. I helped her put the pieces back together, but everyone knows that a mirror with holes is no good, and some of the pieces were lost. so even now, i am helping her find new ones, without breaking someone elses mirror. 030415 ... Soma a hard way to live such a long (or short) life. Amusing(?) that so many of us choose this path. 060608 ... Roaul Duke i dont hate myself anymore. i know i am a good person now. i still blame myself for too much though. 060609 ... naughty bird i hate the previous version of me that hated myself for the "bad" things i've been and done i'm good with it now. New_Order are right "guilt is a useless emotion" 060609 what's it to you? who go blather from