freeze
typhoid standing on the rooftop
waiting for the sunrise
in my pajamas...
it doesn't come.
i get cold.
and go back inside.
000410
...
Meg Well it was midnight and it was new year
well you were dancing so I bought you a beer and you said that you took the children. well go ahead now coz they're probably not mine but before you were faking your heart wasn't breaking at all. You were seen by the washing machine in the hall. Should've known by the calls on the phone should've seen by the mess that you leave. Should've known when you never came home. should've known when you never came home that day.
Teddy gets wild in august. coz him and little boy blue went and joined a rock and roll band. He said he set fire to his office tie and he sat on his arse while Wendy did crack with Peter Pan
001123
...
unhinged i wish that i could freeze my life into that one perfect second where as i kissed you, my heart flopped over. to live that exact second forever would complete me. i'm scared at the thought of being completed. i'm scared at the thought of leaving you. i have matched my identity to a single word but you changed the meaning it holds for me. all this intensity scares me. the depth of my fear to move on....no, things don't always work out how we plan them to. for example, you. 030618
...
user24 "my heart flopped over"

good phrase
030618
...
janaewen artiface 110430
...
unhinged paralysis as a reaction to fear, threat
play dead


ask me how i feel
my tongue will stop working



just stop
he told me all the time when i was younger
what are you crying for?
just stop


i had no words back then for what i was crying for
but_maybe
i was crying for

parts of myself that were missing
something that i needed
i'm sure neurobiology would say
it was my early life isolation
in that incubator

but_maybe
it was something else
more
a distant memory
from a past life

that pushed me out too soon
into that incubator
where i didn't get the hugs i needed
for almost two weeks



the shadow of those days
is long in my life


let me out
leave me alone


ask me how i feel
and my tongue stops working
200701
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from