if_i_asked_you_to_stay spiffy would you? 040822 ... pete my thoughts before i fell asleep last night were these words. we are standing together, or on the phone, you are about to leave, and i whisper, 'if i asked you to stay, would you still go?' and you got a pained look on your face and whispered 'yes' 040822 ... tessa i'm breaking 040822 ... love & hate would you even answer me? Or just let it slip and ignore me? 040822 ... love & hate after all those times you convinced me to stay in this world. That there was something worth staying for. And that one thing that you ripped away from me so suddenly that kept me here. Now what would you do if you knew i was going to commit suicide, you would leave me on the floor in a pool of my own blood and tell everyone i was stupid. You wouldnt convince me otherwise as you have taken that thing worth living away from me. You katie, you are my thing worth living for yet you continue to ignore me and pretend we never happened. I am dieing. I am screaming. But you dont care. Did you ever? Or were you just afraid to have blood on your hands? 040822 ... kookaburra would the reveerse psychology work? 040822 ... once again If you looked at me and said. You can come in. I would, without hesitation. If you said, don't go, I would stay forever. But if I asked you to stay... I'm sure you would leave. 040822 ... unhinged but i never did and it hurts me again being without you i keep reminding myself the old you the old me the way we were old together not now not again not ever again i needed you too maybe it didn't seem like it i needed you to ask me you never did i needed you too and where were you bills up your nose dialing the phone 'drunk' i want there still to be memories where i smile even if sardonic bitter where i smile i needed you too 040823 ... nighean_siofra would you believe i meant it? i know it's far too late for anything to happen but just wondering that suppose it wasn't totally hopeless would you stay? just for me...? 040823 ... latchkey it's not fun for you if i ask you to stay it'd only make you walk away faster and yet if i don't ask you to stay you complain i don't want you around are you confused? or are you toying with me on purpose? because i'm so tired of being your toy that i just don't want to care anymore so i walk away before you can turn back around.. 040823 ... silentbob you'd laugh in my face you'd roll your eyes you'd get distant and weird i'd feel needy and lame i'd feel unhealthy and bad i'd feel creepy and sad bobby's so_pitiful 040824 ... loch you'd wish i hadn't. wish i didn't. wish you never had. 040830 ... maenad shhhh. words are useless in these matters. 040902 ... suicidalchinadoll I'm confused... so confused some days... 041106 ... lurleen lumpkin bunk with me tonight wont you bunk with me tonight im asking wont you bunk with me tonight 041130 what's it to you? who go blather from