numbness Joana. Transporting me rapidly Through some bleak passage This car moves as if it hovered in the air And it does not succumb to the beauty of these trees Nor to this setting sun That slowly collapses behind the mountains Hiding in shame from the stillness of this Looking through an isolating window I see a strange ascending smoke And it repeats itself throughout the whole of this landscape As this transport drives me above the wooden bridge The multifarious smoke becomes clearer And as I look closer The smoke turns into millions of insects The kind that I would kill so irrationally And they all dance around each other As if hypnotised by their own kind Entangling their delicate wings Around a thin pine tree And evoking the trance in which they've lost themselves Like chained nocturne ballerinas Yet suddenly a stronger wind blows Washing them away from the tree And breaking them from each other's glances Their vulnerable bodies flapping Submissive to the blowing They remind me of the way things have become And how I did not prevent them from happening How I didn't notice what would revolve around me As I was too busy finding my way out of numbness. 001009 ... Xipe Totec in relation to comfort 001010 ... Elzbieta "And he knows a light won't stay lit The lion's flown the nest for his love is gone that he gave her There's always one droplet but you forget I'm not your daughter nor will I wear your mother's dress So it is Take a fuel gun Take a fuel gun Thought a war would be much more fun than this numbness" This night. I'm overwhelmed with numbness. 020904 ... kat I feel numb How Could I Have believed you Last night, sitting there Staring at my fingers Listening to you talk, Tell me your new revelations My shoulders start tensing I felt like I was inching, slowly Into the fetal position With one hand over my eyes And one hand covering my heart Like one hand would keep it from breaking All that newfound vulnerability Slipped away at your words All of your external safety The falseness of it The transparency It burned up, with fire hot like tears In both of our eyes You did what everyone said you would I was wrong about you, I guess I was wrong And maybe that’s what hurts most? I was wrong about you And they were right about you And you did all the things they said But no, that’s not all that hurts It just hurts to be hurt When you feel so safe “It’s not like I didn’t know this could happen” I guess its true, you make me feel. 040309 ... stork daddy i'm just not feelin this blathe. 040309 ... daf Sometimes the pain that remains, is there to remind you that you're still alive. It's the numbness that we should be afraid of..not the pain. 210506 what's it to you? who go blather from