customer_service kingsuperspecial Dear General Electric - Much to your relief, I am NOT writing in regards to the exorbitant retirement package of your past CEO, Jack Welsh. If you want to burry him in a tomb of gold with 300 under paid third world child laborers, that is your business. I am writing with a request to return my GE brand AnswerPhone 2100, which I purchased a few months ago. I would like to return it because it is a poorly made, malfunctioning piece of shit. Example: sometimes, after it takes a message, it does not hang up. It records hours of nothing, and keeps the phone line tied up, so I cannot get calls, or retrieve my messages, or anything. Not exactly a step forward for technology or convenience, is it? I hope that I might return this item for another item manufactured by General Electric. Hopefully, to maintain good customer relationships, you will send me a GU*8A Avenger, 30mm Vulcan machine gun. I would consider this a more than fair trade. Please make sure to box magazines, so I will not have to deal with ammunition clutter. I normally only have "light" shooting needs, but with a gun that shoots shells bigger than a baby's arm at 4200 rounds per minute, I'm sure I'l be able to take on tasks I didn't even dream of before. I have heard the slogan that “GE brings good things to life”. How this is done with automatic weaponry is beyond me; but I have found that I learn best by doing, and will hopefully find many creative uses for my new toy. If you have any problems or concerns with this request, please contact me as soon as possible. Best regards, (a) 020925 ... gay gizmo now that right there is a piece of brilliant work. GENIUS! 020926 ... three words customer_service gadget fffffuck 060121 ... dafremen "Excuse me?" Came a bossy voice from behind me. "Hello." I replied. I turned and saw a woman there, with a large man standing in front of her glaring at me. "Do you have this battery?" he demanded of me, then turned toward the woman. "Where's the battery?" he grumbled The woman, apparently frightened, was fumbling desperately through her purse looking for the battery. "I was sure I had it here", she said timidly, "I was so sure I put it in here. Can't we just tell them the number? I'm sure I remember the number." The man launched into a tirade right then and there. "My God woman! You're worthless! I don't know why I even ask you to do ANYTHING! You don't have the brains that God gave a goose!" "I'm sorry, George! I was so sure I packed it!" she practically sobbed. It was at that moment, I felt the glands next to my salivary ducts swell, and before I knew it, a poisonous splotch of acidic mucus had propelled itself from my mouth to his left eye. Within milliseconds, another in his right. He fell to the ground like a sack of mulch. As he lay there, clutching his eyes, kicking and screaming, I turned to the woman, still standing there stunned by what had just happened. "Sorry, ma'am. It was a reflex." 150419 what's it to you? who go blather from