undeserved
FIngers Undeserved Rocks! Well, I say that just because I'm in the band.. but well hey, its fun to particpate isn't it?

www.undeserved.ca
010515
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blown cherry I'm so fucking stupidly happy right now,
and I'm so scared I'm wrong.
So afraid that I'm going to find out that I've been delusional or that there is some massively horrible thing that I'm going to find out that is going to put all this to and end.
Undeserved happiness wreaking its revenge.
030809
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/a   the descriptor of all i seek and the reason for being denied 030809
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x i don't deserve this at all
only a small temptation to tell myself "see, this is why you normally don't put forth full effort, because when you do, you still fail, and then it's even worse"

"at least it only took 3/4 of a year, and not 25 he says" which encapsulates all that he is afraid of. but i didn't have that experience. i had parents who stayed together no matter what. no regard to the fact that is was wrong. so who knows which one of us is right?

it doesn't matter. because it won't work anyway. it hardly matters why. but wondering why is what i do. there's just no one around to answer anymore.

maybe i do deserve this. i deserve this because i should have known better. i should have been practical, and ended things earlier. love is meaningless in the face of logic. love can't survive fear. love is a wretched little thing, strong enough to be a problem, and weak enough to be blown around by everything else. one of those things you get stuck in your sock when you go hiking.
030809
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Dafremen Keep looking wandering heart x.

Love is a stone tied round your heart. Left to its devices it drags behind you, holds you back until the tedium and the torture of its everpresent restriction drives both lovers mad eventually reducing the relationship to a hold out against the urge to untie the knot that has your heart SCREAMING to be free again, not smothered under a microscope or tied to a stone which now lies there, an onerous and detested lump of stone between you.

Still, love is a stone tied round your heart. Carefully swung it can pull you forward, attending to its rythm can aid your stride renew your pace with the added force of another body's mass, all the while and with the years and trust lovers grow closer as they share each other's burdens, at the same time each grows stronger with every burden shared.
030809
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blown cherry brick 030914
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