latent potential is a pretty word, sits well on the tongue laytent the dictionary says it means potentially existing but not presently evident or realized mmm... mmm... mmm... 041229 ... andru235 everything is latent all ideas, potential the rains of imagination are often torrential 041229 ... eatingstars tranquility is latent if_it's_in_you 081120 ... unhinged i hid this fear. deep inside a place i hardly ever go. tarnished i hid this fear. my mother's mortality, the first time i ever heard my father's fear. we are both german in that way. we hid our fear. i was so proud of the way he took care of her. but underneath that pride, there was fear. i have no one in my life to take care of me when i meet death. the book i was reading knocked this out of me; a beautiful melancholy story about a couple where the wife dies at fifty from cancer and the emotional toll that takes on her husband. one of my brother's best friends is dying. he has already had so many friends die. everything seems to be poking this sorespot lately her aneurysm hemorrhaged when she was on the toilet. he found her soon enough that she was eventually ok. one of my first thoughts as i was finally filled in on all the details was 'i could have one of those too because it is genetic and it could burst like that and i would die because i have no one to find me if/when it bursts' dying alone i hid this fear but the sobs wrenched free finally tell the truth 160419 ... Risen I don't know if I see "prints" or "homoxesuality" as the most obvious sequitor. Says so much about me 160419 ... flowerock. I think this is a common_fear. I_am_not_alone, I have a partner, but we're not always near eachother. I was hit with overwhelming and intense fear last month while walking our dog. First, if something happened to me while walking her, she might be stuck to my dead body by the leash in my hand which I am sure would be horrible for her. Second, I would be alone, except for her, and I don't want that. I understood just how much I want to NOT die_alone. I much_prefer that I die in the company of my heartmate. I didn't know it was something I was so concerned with. Now I wonder what to do, what if he dies before I do? I guess we have to learn to be alright in ourselves and alone even when we have lovers or friends or family often near. We may have to leave this world alone. 160419 what's it to you? who go blather from