unjust
Soma I know a girl whose mother starves her, degrades her, and treats her as if she wasn't human. It's not just unfair. it's more than that. And i'm 300 miles away and I can do nothing for her, except sit here, on my computer, and try to persuade her that life is worth living and if she can just make it to 18 things can get better. 170525
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flowerock. If this is true, could you find out more about her and report it to CPS or would that just make things worse? Does she have friends who could give her food ect?

Difficult situation. Thanks for reaching out to someone in need, it might be all she needs to make it.

Hopefully 18 isn't too far off. There was a program called youth_on_their_own when I was in high school, they helped kids get emancipated and into housing and jobs.
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Soma it would just make things worse. I've thought about it - extensively. talked to people who used to be with CPS. Group housing in the area sucks balls. Fostering is unlikely in her situation.
i've cried plenty of this. It feels morally wrong to me. I think doing the "right" thing has never been so difficult in my life.
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Flowerock Well, we do what we can... and hope she and every other child, even adult, makes it through and learns to bloom regardless of the emotional storm clouds. Even at our weakest, we are so strong and resilient... hope she finds that to be true for her too. 170906
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R The hardest part of childhood trauma isn't the trauma itself.

It isn't the facts of what happened which keep you awake at night 25 years later.

It's not how you saw it all as a child.

It's how you see it as an adult.

As an adult, you know it wasn't ok, you know in your head it wasn't the child's fault, yet in your heart, you might blame them for not doing or saying something. You blame whoever hurt you not only for what they did, but for what they took. The childhood you should have had, the innocence you lost. The normal. The happiness.

And the hardest part of all of that is how it felt to think that what was happening was ok. Because as a child you literally don't know any better. You didn't have the skills or the knowledge to say what you'd say or do what you'd do now, as an adult.

Which is all about being alone. How it felt to be that alone, to have no champion. To have no one to talk to about the secret. And sometimes even as an adult it's hard to talk about it.

... all of which is to say that what you've given this child is the knowledge that she is not alone and it is not ok, and that there is hope.

Which is priceless, and you should know that.
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L The hardest part of childhood trauma isn't the trauma itself.

It isn't the facts of what happened which keep you awake at night 25 years later.

It's not how you saw it all as a child.

It's how you see it as an adult.

As an adult, you know it wasn't ok, you know in your head it wasn't the child's fault, yet in your heart, you might blame them for not doing or saying something. You blame whoever hurt you not only for what they did, but for what they took. The childhood you should have had, the innocence you lost. The normal. The happiness.

And the hardest part of all of that is how it felt to think that what was happening was ok. Because as a child you literally don't know any better. You didn't have the skills or the knowledge to say what you'd say or do what you'd do now, as an adult.

Which is all about being alone. How it felt to be that alone, to have no champion. To have no one to talk to about the secret. And sometimes even as an adult it's hard to talk about it.

... all of which is to say that what you've given this child is the knowledge that she is not alone and it is not ok, and that there is hope.

Which is priceless, and you should know that.
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unhinged everywhere i look it's all i see 170908
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