falling_angel pushpins this delicate porcelein angel fell from my clumsy hands and tumbled down, succumbing to gravity's appetite. Her dainty wings did not flutter because they are useless ornate things meant to make her appear docile and ethereal. My angel crashed and lay battered on the cool tile floor. Her wings had snapped off from her fall to my world, and now she is an ordinary girl like me. her smile is still plastered on But the truth of her feathered freedom is buried in the trash and I know she will never forget the wings she never bothered to use. 020319 ... ever dumbening trippy syncronicity: i just got home to find that one of my refrigerator_magnet_poetry words had fallen--it was 'angel.' i turn on my computer and BAM! falling_angel greets me. 020319 ... pushpins haha... pretty silly. had the urge to post that yesterday, but I wrote it a while back. 020320 ... *nat* The Devil was a fallen Angel 030109 ... satan satan satan yeah, i still have scorchmarks from the entry-burn who knew? 030109 ... sabbie im not clumsy, im just... over enthusastic occasionally. 030817 ... sab falling angel falling past the strawberries missing the incecream entirly poor girl 050323 ... Erin Falling hurts, especially when you can't stop. 080625 ... Syrope so of course i find her journal. months and months and months of things you kept from me, again. how many times were you using my computer to be the sole commenter in her journal while i was sitting on the couch wondering why you chose to be so far from me? it's just a big pile of shit. you couldn't manage a complete update about anything we did. i guess you didn't have time, what with carefully supporting and responding to her. mainly i feel guilt. guilt for not valuing myself enough to cut and run so many times before. i don't know how i'm supposed to make it up to me. i took her to meet him last night, and the only comment she made about him, when i asked what she thought, was "he absolutely lit up when he saw you. he was so happy just to be in the same room as you. it's time you had that." fuck. i'm sorry, amanda. 080626 ... unhinged i feel like i've been waiting my whole life to get my wings back; there have been rare glimpses where i just know i used to have them. the day i looked in my niece's newborn eyes (that day has been a meditation for me lately) the day he walked across towns to hold my hand and tell me he loved me the day my brother woke me up weeping the day he watched from the stage understood my devotion and whispered_in_the_ear wordless_conversations i just know i used to have them 080626 what's it to you? who go blather from