sincerity optic discretion Alas ... that which the world lacks ... 020128 ... silentbob i know a girl who cries when she practices violin each note sounds so pure it just cuts into her and then the melody comes pouring out her eyes now to me everything just sounds like a lie bright_eyes 020416 ... silentbob the kid carries his walkmen on his long bus ride to omaha 020510 ... andy c'mon...really? 040331 ... Syrope today i scrubbed dishes after the kids had gone, and suddenly i remembered last year when you came on the last day to help me clean up after the tshirt class. first you watched me, in complete awe. you said you were amazed at how much effort i put into the small things. i sorted the woman's bead case that she'd given to me full of beads all out of order. i said that i always liked to leave other people's stuff i used in better condition than when i got it. after a while you got angry that i was being so meticulous. it's odd how that memory came back to me. there was no real reason for me to block it, but there it was, coming out of storage. i'm so tired 040712 ... pSyche You speak so truthfully, friend. I hear your soul whispering that truth that you hold within your warm and fluttering bird heart. Such sincerity, such emotion. Such a connection and sense of "I_am" that I do not think I could ever obtain. When I stand next to you, I feel ashamed to call us friends. And not because of you, dear_friend. My heart is black, and you stand so white. I cannot bear the thought of your brightness being dimmed by my soot self. 070805 ... flowerock I really value sincerity, so I was happy today that a coworker did I was "weird_in_a_good_way" and that I am me and not anyone else not trying to be anything_but_me and that's_great she said laughing real_laughs. My other coworker just said I was weird, Kombucha_is_white_people_drink he saI'd laughing and joking about how white people are. another coworker said I was a strange creature because I was eating a cucumber on my break. I said, but everyone eats cucumbers... he said, yeah. Like in salads! 150207 ... unhinged 'i am not kidding' sometimes people laugh when i tell my truth. i get defensive. but the universe has handed me the crazy_wisdom that not all people can handle the truth but its my job to tell it. i say what i mean i mean what i say 150208 what's it to you? who go blather from