depending
bijou that's exactly it. i can't easily leave until i know when i will see you again. i wish you were mine for every second of the day.


i have to have something to look forward to.

thank god i have one this week.
011111
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paste! on point of view. letting go. not flipping out in front of child. relaxing, not punishing. banishing guilt. taking responsibility for everything i do. moving forward. dislingering. doing what feels right. respecting myself again. telling her to fuck off. reconciling with her. big picture action only. big dreams, little dreams. stop feeling trapped. getting lost in unbelievables. conjuring the never costly to afford a new priceless reality. fucking jumping ship to an alternate universe where none of this cyclic bullshit can exist. coming back to earth. dealing. setting examples. being a good statue for mankind. not collapsing repeatedly. finding a damn good glue to stay upright. being a shoulder rather than needing one. start the being good with isolation. loneliness. apart. enhanced, reborn. breathing. aging gracefully like a panther in a ballet. a strong, cunning pirate hiding his huge heart. depending on welcoming yourself to the stage and absorbing life with vigor, determination, sensitivity and humility. tons of humility. being real, gradually. being sparkly and efficient. letting wren know she is the most beautiful and perfect 2 year old on the planet. planning. destroying plans. rationalizing the slip into oblivion, head shake, not that one. laughing! oh my! don't forget to depend on laughing! that's all there really is. and love. catching it like rhinovirus. but that's a bit more like catching a meth_moth with a toothbrush. so fast so gone so long. not punishing. not drifting. culture! riddles. yogurt. multiplicity in velocity. one step, two step, dimension swap. depending on good friends for amusement and ideas. extra sharp cheddar. smooth roads. poems from old homies worth repeating 30x daily. telling her that we'll not kill each other, that we'll grow up and figure it out. rid guilt. discard trap idea. control regret. eschew blame. salud. do whatever. doesn't have to be so heavy. depending on graphite_salsa and scahu. calm and wise. 090426
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yestoall that means the all about it and the great 100510
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from