feeling_ghetto birdz in the hood listening, appropriately enough, to Birdman 030224 ... magdalena Umm...letsee I'm a little on the what other people call me as gothy... so why the FUCK am I listening to Nelly? 030225 ... ghetto bird hmm...ghetto goth a little Gravediggaz here a little Christian Death there, a little Haujobb and some Cypress Hill, some Fields of the Nephilim and some Ice-T 030225 ... unhinged i guess you thought it was cool. it kind of made me sick. 030225 ... birdmad Listening to Bartok in my house on a weekend nighta few weeks ago as the neighbors down the street are bumping Ludacris or maybe some ranchera or some of that annoying "banda" shit from Sinaloa, dressed in black, no jewelry, sharpened black nails, neighborhood that has learned to sleep beneath the flight path of the airport. I'm an old school goth, my musical tastes were in part by my surroundings. Crazy mix of kids we grew up liking the very first hip-hop records and 70's metal. Hearing the_cure the_smiths new_order and joy_division as a result of the kids i met in a catholic_school just opened up a whole new set of musical doors for me. I close none of those doors once i cross them. I identify with the ghetto part from the neighborhoods i've lived in, and the goth part from much of the life i've led qed, ghetto goth 030225 ... unhinged i am playing some bartok violin duets on my senior recital. it's primal stuff. definitely not fucking mozart. 030227 ... birdmad Concerto for Orchestra / Music for Strings, Percussion and Celesta (Leonard Bernstein leading the NY Philharmonic 1960/'64) appropriately foreboding bouts of occasional_dissonance put to good use 030227 ... unhinged i find myself amazed by the suburban snobbery in this town. or on this side of this town rather. and i guess it also comes along with the territory of the violin; high culture, high art, damn expensive...blah blah blah. last week i was at a kegger here; i got high for the first time in months. i was drinking like a fish because i had talked to him twice that week when he decides that he's ready to talk again. it got suddenly fall around here. i'm standing in the backyard smoking a bowl. i wander back in the house looking for robert and i feel and hear and see the points and stares 'look at that girl; she's trashed' uummm...YEAH. i thought that was the fucking point of a kegger. HELLO. and i'm sitting in orchestra this week and the biggest bitch in the section has a habit of turning around when she hears those of us behind her making mistakes; when she sits there while we are supposed to be playing half the time. she turned around to look at one of us and i almost lost it. i had this daydream of me throwing my violin across the room and getting up in the middle of orchestra and kicking her ass. around here, i'm always feeling_ghetto and damn proud of it. we don't fuck around. not a day in our lives. 031005 ... fjirio with my watered down red kool aid! 110614 what's it to you? who go blather from