the_bell_jar . . 040517 ... endless desire damn. i didn't mean to do that. just start a new page. i assumed there already was one and by posting the period, i would find it. well now i mine as well talk about it. incredible book. incredibly depressing as well. i ought to provide you with a quote. i have this terrific habit of marking up books i read because i will be able to find the best passages much easier. here is one of my favourites: "I hadn't washed my hair for three weeks, either. I hadn't slept for seven nights. My mother told me I must have slept, it was impossible not to sleep in all that time, but if I slept, it was with my eyes wide open, for I had followed the green, luminous course of the second hand and the minute hand and the hour hand of the beside clock through their circles and semicircles, every night for seven nights, without missing a second, or a minute, or an hour. The reason I hadn't washed my clothes or my hair was because it seemed so silly. I saw the days of the year stretching ahead like a series of bright, white boxes, and separating one box from another was sleep, like a black shade. only for me, the long perspective of shades that set off one box from the next had suddenly snapped up, and I could see day after day after day glaring ahead of me like a white, borad, infintely desolate avenue. It seemed silly to wash one day when I would only have to wash again the next. It made me tired just to think of it. I wanted to do everything once and for all and be through with it." sylvia_plath is incredible. i would really like to read some of her poetry next, because, as an aspiring, one-day writer/poet, she is a wonderful role-model, minus the saddness and suicide bit. what i mean is, i enjoy her writing style completely. 040517 ... amy and the purplely apostrophe i haven't read it lately. but she's good. really good. i'm on her side. ted hughes shares my birthday and my birthminute. true to my self-loathing, i *would* hate him. you got to be who you are, that's the truth! 170417 ... unhinged thanks mrs lenk 170417 ... amy and the purplely apostrophe you've got to earn it i'm told. well, reason it's mentioned (by me) is it came up in my thoughts independent of everything else. when you miss out on x and y , catastrophically you can get an uber-z going. that's not just reacting to the world and your relatedness to all of it. that's producing a response. could be wise, could be neither here nor there. always will be good at what it does, and that clarity is important to the therapeutic side of things. who is mrs. lenk. 170418 what's it to you? who go blather from