unwanted
noone special You never seem to want me.

I don't understand... you're always telling me how you're "so attracted to me" and I "turn you on," but you never act upon it, or seem to want to.

If I speak up about it, you get defensive, and tell me I'm in the wrong, and I shouldn't want it so much, but it's just the way I am.

I think every teen goes through a phase in their life where their libido takes over and gets their desires and hormones out... I never got that.

I was left high and dry to fend for myself, and that's not working out anymore.

You've already been around the block and done your thing, so you never want to, which leaves me with the crushing feeling that you just don't want me, or i'm not good enough for you.

I don't even know why I'm typing this, it won't solve anything.

I guess I should just stop like you said.
050314
...
megan i feel unwanted when you don't want to spend time with me
i feel unwanted when i miss you and it becomes a big joke to you and you get offended when i tell you it hurts me
i feel unwanted when you don't answer my phonecalls, at least to tell me hello, that you're busy, or even that you just don't want to talk right now
just an explanation will do
we could talk it out
i feel unwanted when we're in a group and you touch and laugh and talk with the other girls more than you do me... even when some of those girls are my best friends

and i understand this is probably just another one of those times is what you'll say... but sometimes, even not during those times, i can understand myself clearly

if i did this to you, if i didn't answer your phonecalls or didn't care if you missed me, you wouldn't be upset
and it kills me to think that, because you've put me between a rock and a hard place
i can't show you my anger/hurt/misunderstanding because you wouldn't care and you'd just move yourself farther away, just out of my reach
but when i hold it inside, i feel like i'm just waiting around on you, hoping that someday you'll come and surprise me when i'm upset
just to talk
or to visit

i'm always apologizing
and sometimes i just wish i could get some understanding on your part

i love you so much
050706
...
rage i feel alone when theres all these people
because they've all got their backs turned to me
the painted picture on the back of their shirts gives me a fake smile and an apologetic look
im sick of this
trying to beleive i'm a good person here
051006
...
three words becoming unwanted a_blessing 061003
...
nom unloved 070425
...
unhinged i spend a lot of time alone now 070425
what's it to you?
who go
blather
from