im_so_tired JdAwG "I'm so tired, I haven't slept a wink I'm so tired, my mind is on the blink" -The Beatles I'm tired of competing. I'm tired of competing with the past. I'm tired of competing with the girl across the table. I'm tired of being nothing more to you than the fugly kid. I'm tired of hearing stories that I don't want to hear. I'm tired of wondering. I'm tired of being thought of as a nobody, especially by you. I'm tired of bullshit. I'm going to play my guitar, and go to school. Maybe that'll help. One can only hope. 040513 ... Syrope just because i chose to lay around unconscious all week rather than put on a little monkey show for you and those strangers you insist are my family doesn't mean i'm rested now my bed was a pad of foam on the bathroom floor, for crying out loud i'm not satisfied with how i ended the semester, but i survived one of the hardest weeks of my life. i made it through by pushing down the uncertainties and telling myself it'd all be ok when i got a chance to rest. so now, instead of resting the free weeks i had, it's time to start work. something else to suck some life out of me. and people are already starting to make other demands. you won't let me go visit anyone. i know you won't. but it's back to first grade playing dolls when i would be accused of not being a friend when i wouldn't go ask you. so i'd always ask. and once the friend left i'd always get beaten for asking. it's not any different now. this summer is what's different. there are people i need to see. and how am i supposed to tell them that i'm too cowardly to try? that trying will make my life more miserable than not getting to see them right now? it's hard to imagine being more miserable than i am now...but i'm sure you'll find a way. 040514 ... pSyche "I’m tired. Tired of playing the game. Ain’t it a crying shame, I’m so tired. God dammit I'm exhausted." (some movie) 041220 what's it to you? who go blather from