flash_to_the_past distorted tendencies So when I go over the things I have writteen here and in red in the past, I think: What in the hell? I'm glad I grew up.. But maybe even as the years go by and we all get older, we never really truly change, still the same, maybe i little wiser and coldhearted and less trusting. 031212 ... (yes) why is that so? that we become less trusting. Or rather, why should that be so? Is the world truly the harsh place that we become embittered to? 040622 ... a chaotic gift to idealism the world is so. this odes not mean that the sun isnt out somewhere. sometimes the most beautiful things grow in the harshest of places. we grow untrusting of the world around us. we find it harder and harder to be fully trusting of anything and/or anyone. these are the things that ruin the best of things for us. sometimes we have to learn to suffer. some of us teach ourselves this torment throughout our lives. be it mental or physical, it is self inflicted pain, so that we can one day be fully prepared for the worst pain of all. trust. i trust you. i have hurt myself enough and those around me have done the same to me. dont be one of them. i trust you. you dont need to teach me anymore about hurt. i trust you. trust me.. i trust you. *hugs* 050623 ... no reason it's all we ever do anymore 050623 ... unhinged this is the worst time of year; too many anniversaries and birthdays i don't want to remember. i'm sure you'd be surprised that i still remember baby. you'll be 34 in a couple of days cause for a couple months you were 11 years older than me. yes, i remember. i_will_remember a promise and a curse 050623 ... a chaotic gift to idealism trust me, i trust you. so, trust in me. i think we could use a lesson in something consistent, something good. i'm tired of being taught pain. i know you are as well. how about we do something good for once. this 25 year lesson on hurt and pain has grown old. how about you? 050623 ... nomme) and here we have forest...this was before the war 050623 ... littledoseofperfection i trust you. 050707 ... poo and here we have bitch... this was before the indulgence of puberty 050711 ... distorted tendencies It's been so long since I've been back here, to blather. It's kind of amazing going through all your old things you wrote. Comparing the person you were then, to the person you are now. I love you all. And I've learned to let go. 050811 what's it to you? who go blather from