wasteland_daze notme arms as hinges a refrigerator my heart left hip a bent tricycle wheel concrete in my eyes i have feathers for marrow there is a helichopter chasing the hare i breed i'm running between wires trash land king 031115 ... notme wastel_and_daze played fish with the waves 031115 ... notme forget the map it's over here 031115 ... misstree it wouldn't ache so dull or so deep if i hadn't been so high before. once upon a time, i was queen of the world, and appreciated every moment of it, savored and relished and yawped and shared and now, well, i get by alright, usually, and the days are bearable, and i have a home and a job, who could ask for more? once in a while something interesting happens, and every blue moon or two, i have that uncontained laughter or crazy grin that i used to, but then it fades and i'm taunted by memories of lush enchanted forests and ballrooms carved from glass while stuck out here in the drab nothing that somehow stole over everything i cherished. there's gotta be an edge, if i keep trudging long enough. 060529 ... Ouroboros flew into LA to visit my dying grandfather 060529 ... unhinged lithium_sketch y_town to_my_boys oxys youngstown le_petit_mort and oh so many more 060530 ... Ouroboros LA is breaking me down. the sun beats and the traffic zooms and i am lost in the city of angeles. 060531 ... Ouroboros i cannot believe i have been here since february- this city of people and smog and cars and billboards. We just returned from a day camping up in the Angeles Natl forest- with air crisp and clean, with pine trees, with bluejays and hawks- in all that space i had space for my life to unfold out of me and take shape- i am not trapped here, i am giving too much energy to financial concern, i need to meditate and exercise more to create space against all the negative thoughts, i need to take better care of my body (although i don't know how), and i can't be in a loving relationship if i'm holding myself back because of self-loathing. and i cannot live here for much longer 070607 what's it to you? who go blather from