andru235 i *gasped* when a recent post, in which i used the word 'blatherer', showed up and 'blatherer' was not underlined!!!

i am gasping yet again!

ok, i am done gasping. one really should make a point to limit one's gasp-sessions to under a minute; decorum, my dears, is what holds together the tenuous bond between donuts and jingoism.
. blatherskite 050427
. 151211
Risen I have been a blatherer for a long time. Over a decade.

I tried to figure out why I like it so much. I've been trying to figure out a few things.

It seems like the right time to do so. My family is finally moving house - to a place with no history for me. A clean slate. That feels somehow perfect.

It has led to a lot of thinking, as for various reasons I have a lot of time to think right now. Broken bones and surgeries give you thinking time, I've always found.

So in the movies, in those teen angst dramas, when a couple have their ups and down but eventually get their happy ending, it implies it's been worth it. That it's all been worth it, every single up and all those horrible downs. There isn't really an ending with "well, that was great for my emotional growth but now let's not speak to each other again" in the movies. But there are those endings in real life, and I think I understand why, now. That you don't need to validate something with the extremes. Maybe it is just enough for you to take a quiet moment and think "on balance, that did teach me some things I am glad I now know".

Maybe I'm growing up.

Why am I a blatherer? Is it because it is a way to talk to myself? To get things out when I have no one to talk to about the things which cross my mind? Maybe. I know it isn't the unofficial chronicle of an epic love-affair. Because, honestly, I want something clean. I want to stand in the sun. I don't want someone who would take me "in spite of" who I used to be, but because of who I am now.

Might I keep on with blather? Yeah. But today I realise why I am a blatherer. Not for her, but for me.
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