all_this_silence whitechocolatewalrus [what am I to do with all this silence] there's a gap where I end and you begin i'm up on a cloud and i can't come down and i can't come down (we accept the love we think we deserve) ..not everyone has a sob story and even if they do, it's no excuse so many crimes my mind won't stop i can't stop it won't disconnect i don't want to think my life is swirling i don't know where i am what am i going to do with all this silence i can't stop thinking you lie you liar i have nothing to say no words nothing i am blank the trees are dancing swaying in the distance and i try and i reach and i just can't make it i am so close so close to leaving this cold cold world this sad place i was leaving antarctica but i'm still here and i don't know where i am and the trees are having so much fun so much dancing if only i could just have one more chance if only i could just taste the sky sleep in the stars and rest on the moon i don't know where i'm going and i don't know where i came from what am i going to do with all this silence 040503 ... love & hate All this silence surrounds me. All this silence consumes me. All this silence swallows me. All this silence caresses me. All this silence makes it harder to breathe. All this silence makes it harder to think. All this silence makes it harder to remember. All this silence is too overwhelming, too new to me, to unsafe, to lonely without you. I need you in my silence to make it silent once again. The love that thrives within my veins for you. Make it silent. Come back my only love. 040504 ... Piso Mojado i saw this evening before my eyes all the faults and mistakes that make me and will shape my life unto its end. and 'it's not going to stop' was my music mantra of this futile life. and everything added up to nothing. and all sound was silent. and all was as it has been and as it will be, and i felt the utter despair of belonging to this eggshell_existence. 040504 ... ... OM... 040505 what's it to you? who go blather from