alone fallen one...apart from the rest 010125 ... twiggie i'd rather be alone, than with 2 other people who are ignoring me and don't realize it. gradually over the years it's built up. it's something i choose, i can only be around people for so long before i need to have some time to myself. i feel so abnormal. everyone else i know needs to get out of the house. they need to be with friends. what's wrong with me 010126 ... chanaka leave me alone did you ever think that there is a reason i don't want to go out? i don't see the need to go and get plastered every day and night of the weekend. i am fucked up enough without booze 010126 ... j_blue see: hell 010126 ... teran666 what is it to be alone?...i don't think i've been alone for my whole life...i have wished sometimes that i could be, but there's always that voice that talks to me...why?...the best i can get is be around others so that voice will spend it's time analyzing others and leave me to my thoughts...i'm not schitzo...i'm just not one person... 010201 ... starbound A familiar feeling engulfs me. I'm chasing spirits again . . . The spirit of love, it eludes me, A hopeless cause fading away. The spirit of family dying, We talk but have no words to say. My history losing its bearings, No more than three years to my past. I'm dreading the final desertion, When there's no one for me to hold fast. The spirit communicates madly, Needing only a voice on the phone. The spirit is walking alone now, And looking for somewhere called home. The silence preys heavy upon me, Whispers that hurt and confuse. I was there when it finally mattered, But for you I am yesterday's news. The spirit of solitude leaving, Sensing his work here is through. The spirit is losing the battle, Seeing life with a fatalist view. I reach out and talk in the ether, Try to find all the right words to say. The silence is louder than ever, Press delete and switch off, turn away. I throw myself into the tumult, An attempt to forget and erase. In the hope that occasional moments Will light all the inbetween days. Can I do this forever? I wonder. Can I find how to cope on my own? The weeks and the months they continue And the spirits still find me alone. A familiar feeling engulfs me. I'm chasing spirits again . . . 010304 ... mikey alone is like depression. often they go hand in hand. for me its the ultimate enigma. its like a riddle i just cant figure out..its on the tip of my tongue but i just...cant.....say it. i hate being alone. most times i think i could solve it myself but i cant do it. the worst part of being alone is when others say things like "gosh your so cute why arent girls all over you" "gosh your so sweet" "well your such a gentlemen" yes if only life were so simple. the people who say these things are either ignorant or fake and trying to get you to shut up. i hate nobody in this world. but i hate being alone. hell im ready to cry right now. sometimes it feels like im walking through life when i should be running. like i cant catch up to everyone else. worse..it often feels like everyone doesnt care if i do catch up. alone to me is walking or driving on or by the beach i live by...and wishing i had someone next to me to share it with. alone is watching a couple fight and argue and wishing i at least had someone to fight and argue with. alone is staring out your window on a rainy day and wishing lightening would crash down right there on the end of your nose and make it all go away. alone is sitting here right now typing this with tears in my eyes wishing for change. i would say hope but i have negative views on hope. some say people who are lonely or depressed are weak. i say stand in my shoes for 5 minutes and see how weak you are. life is always a double edged blade. sometimes i wish the blade would finish me off instead of letting me waste away into this abyss of a hell hole we call life. thank goodness for poetry. things like blather. in my life i have few friends. i should consider myself blessed that my friends really are FRIENDS. but yet all are far away. all my dearest friends are online. just once id love to get a or give a REAL FUCKING HUG and not a :::::hug::: or xoxoxoxox. i get tired of meeting the most amazing people but always so far away. worse yet is falling in love with someone far away. i dont know whats worse having nobody or having someone but you cannot hold them. you cannot touch them. smell them. 010306 ... brown cardigan boy like i am right now, and that reflection on the screen is staring back just as blank. alone is when you've realized everyone has turned and left you because they thought you needed some time to think things through. but really all those people who said they were your friends wouldn't have let you down that way. that's the worst. right now i have that beestung confusion like someone stuffed cotton in my ears and i don't know what to do. a phone call. one decision that is so trivial is the one that is the hardest. 010306 ... soia you aren't just alone you can be happy and alone you're lonely and you've pretty much described why so I have this to say: the more you accept yourself, the more others will accept you 010306 ... nocturnal easier said than done. I feel ya, mikey, I think most blatherers do. otherwise we'd talk about these kinds of things with actual people rather than faceless names on a screen. I also couldn't agree more that people only make things worse when they try to make you feel better. Like, when they say, I bet tons of guys want you, they're just too shy to show it. right, every guy for almost 19 years now has just been too shy to express the slightest genuine interest in me beyond some drunken random hook-up? sure, that makes sense. 010306 ... mikey i think if i had a penny for every time i heard something like what you hear Noct' id be rich! hmm maybe i should collect a penny if i do hear it "oh HEY pardon um do you have a penny" each time they say it! 010306 ... mikey gonna post this on blue somewhere to. most of my poems are me being alone. here is one. Broken glass falls Upon the feet Of those who walk alone A rose pedal falls Into the chaos That which is my home It creeps and stalks Onto the docks The mind begins to groan Have you wisdom Unreachable shadow To soften this path of woe Whats worse then the riddle Is being in the middle The answer will never be known 010306 ... Aimee somedays I like being alone. somedays I need to be alone. somedays I shouldn't be alone. somedays I am alone. somedays I am happy Today is one of those days 010310 ... birdmad One a.m. i could have gone out didn't want to i'm hallucinating not sight or sound but a scent a cologne other than my own i'm thinking someone i know --someone far from here-- is not alone tonight (unfortunately, i can't ask that question as it would be well out of bounds) a night like this... 010311 ... silentbob Whenever I'm alone with you You make me feel like i am whole again 010311 ... fallen ...by circumstance ...by default ...and sometimes even by choice ...but always ...always ...alone 010717 ... silentbob don't words on blather look so sad when you press 'from' and it just says 'emotional is alone' or 'dashboard_confessional is alone' or 'katie is alone' 011009 ... silentbob and it doesn't make much difference if the only word they appear in is 'alone' 011009 ... pralines&cream It's 12:20 a.m. now, and I feel like such a blather loner. Red is dormant till tomorrow it feels like, and blue is moving soooooo slowly. I have reason to sleep, at least. Nighty-night. 020109 ... pilgrim Sun slowly settling Twilight arising Full and Dark Subtly shimmering Ancient Starlight Strikes my eyes And kindles thoughts Of whistful longing Sweet rememberence While night birds calling Offer up their hearts so true In the turning Of this moment All my thoughts Return to You 020110 ... the masque of the red bird From childhood's hour I have not been As others were--I have not seen As others saw--I could not bring My passions from a common spring. From the same source I have not taken My sorrow; I could not awaken My heart to joy at the same tone; And all I lov'd, I lov'd alone... 020110 ... bijou i like being alone most of the time. but it's important that i feel like someone is wondering where i am. 020110 ... peyton I'm never alone I'm alone all the time Are you that one or do you lie 020408 ... lulie It's a very crowded lonliness. 020408 ... peyton I feel it too, searching skies. I need you. I miss you. 020502 ... we knew it would happen so much for peyton and rhin "forever" 020502 ... Sonya Take this and hold my love for you. In separate times we think as two. In paradise I'll drown in you. Still searching skies. I need you. I want you. I love you, love you, I love only you...love you. Remember me near. There may be times when it's not right for me to be there. but remember me near. Remember me near. There may be times when it's not right for me to be there. but remember me near. -BT, "Remember" 020616 ... alice From my childhood's hour I have not been As others were-I have not seen As others saw-I could not bring Mt passions from a common spring. From the same source i have not taken My sorrow; I could not awaken My heart to joy at the same tone; And all I lov'd I lov'd alone. Then-in my childhood-in the dawn From ev'ry depth of good and ill The mystery which binds me still; From the torrent, or the fountain, From the red cliff of the mountain, From the sun that 'round me roll'd In its autumn tint of gold- From the lighting in the sky As it pass'd me flying by- From the thunder and the storm, And the cloud that took the form (When the rest of Heaven was blue Of a demon in my view) 020731 ... birdmad in the half-light listening quietly to some music and the turning of the fan and to the creaking of my house. 020801 ... Jarec the worst way to sleep....... the woest way to sit at home....... the worst way to feel....... 020912 ... SuicidalAngel Stop lights turning red theres nothing on tv no ones coming home tonight starting to feel lonly 020912 ... it is just the way it is continually 030119 ... DammitJanet sitting alone in a dark cold room in the middle of the night listening to the music playing from the hall. the closer i get to it, the quieter it becomes until all i can hear is the hum of the christmas lights still wrapped around the banister. the floor creaks as i make my way back and as soon as i turn it starts up again. i shrug, sit down, and sing along. 030119 ... screwing fro virginity why do i get the feeling that i am the only one here who likes to be alone. and why do i get the feeling that i am never alone in my own house, even when there is no one but me home. 030119 ... 0of46 i hate sleeping alone more than anything else, and it's even worse after three nights of sleeping with the girl i love 030120 ... psychobabe I cant stand up for all this pain, everyone loves a sickened game- and these pills make my own parade, sun has burned up and gone away- Well everytime we used to fall, everyone...makes you sick... your ashamed... Trapped inside held accountable, everyone loves a sickened game- always joke when I feel betrayed, sun has burned up and gone away- BLAME! Can you come from this love? Can you come from this world? Can you come from this love? Coming down...coming down...coming down 030408 ... . you are 030516 ... lotuseater the hardcore motherfucking zombie cuz... fuck everyone else. 040119 ... handel for none are more or less alone than i, sitting in my cell, waiting to die. 040516 ... silentbob better off better off better off better off better off better off 040711 ... Grandma Death Every creature on this earth dies alone 040712 ... claire Introverts prefer to spend time by themselves than with other people. There is a bias towards extroversion in American social life, but introversion is no less normal. 040713 ... Q to be more precise, not necessarily alone 050622 ... KISA alone always alone nobody knows me but everybody loves me. the thing about being the best is people keep on trying to beat you 060426 ... Emptyness Alive never and always 060502 ... crOwl stains on the t-shirt never and always... so well said. that's me, basically, on the job, in my business. every day so different from the next. and so if i'm alone, who will be my friend? the birds? sure, they can always provide cartoon dialouge. the trees? absolutely. they can always provide stability. port? now you're talking. 060502 ... Isaou When there is no one left 070505 ... past having my closest and most common companions leave for a few months and being overtired and borderline insomniac doesn't help matters much. 090120 ... no reason i don't usually notice or think anything of it if people are alone at bars or concerts or other such events. maybe if they talk to me, i'm more likely to notice. i'm still reluctant to go to certain places alone because of the stigma attached to it. i'm trying not to be like this, because i don't want to miss out on things just because i don't always have a going-out buddy. it's just lately it seems like i never do. friends that are currently in similar life places as me are in different physical places. figures. 090407 ... no reason it's easier yet sadder to always do things this way 090514 ... unhinged sometimes being alone stops me from doing things also 090514 ... cocoon its never really been an issue - me being alone. but today. today. i really wish there was someone here to help me out. 090829 ... cr0wl lonely but never alone. 090829 ... no reason maybe we're always alone maybe we're never alone 100205 ... no reason again, recurring recurring 100227 ... Bespeckled It's one of those nights, one of those lying-in-bed, quietly-soaking-in-the-night-sky-and-the-stars nights, brought on by some intangible amalgamation of all the right thoughts at all the right moments surging up through all the right nerves - unexpected, but here it is, the feeling, ready to burst forth, but pausing (ohh not for too long!) at the precipice, requiring only your touch (please, now, I can't wait much longer) just your electric touch (even just a finger tip) to set them all ablaze, a fireworks explosion readying for discharge. But you're not here (damnit), you're not here. So tonight my touch will have to do. 101008 ... uoasI It just feels better, sorry. 110908 ... nr it's more noticeable in a negative way when you need to talk to someone but nobody you want to talk to is available 160515 ... nr it seems more and more that if i don't catch up to these life developments, this is where i'll be i prefer creating it for myself 220415 ... nr "avoid using being alone as an escape." there needs to be a follow-up sentence on how to feel as safe when you're not alone. 220420 ... nr it's just always been this way. everyone else has whoever they have, and she has herself. for the most part. 220705 what's it to you? who go blather from