borderline epitome of incomprehensibility So here's the thing that was stressing me out the most about the immer_immersion German class in Kassel: one student was kicked out and I'm not sure whether it was justified. Or it might have been best for her, but the circumstances that led to her more unbalanced actions might have been avoided. And the program director could have communicated better. So. LN or Lindsey who I mentioned in woyzeck_and_company, in wrong_ass_word, didn't come to class for two days in a row. The second one was the day before the whole group left for Berlin, and the director John called an assembly. Normal procedure. Safety tips in Berlin, etc. But then he mentioned a student had been sent home, saying, "We don't make this decision lightly, but it was for the safety of herself and others." Then, "Try not to speculate or put too much stock in narratives that might be going around. If you have any questions about it, you can ask me directly." Well. Now I could get why another student called him condescending. It wasn't just what he said, but the way he talked. I was paraphrasing, but he did say "narratives" instead of "stories," which struck me at the time as incredibly pompous. (This was hypocritical; he probably reached for the nearest available word, and found a big one instead of a small one. It happens.) But my biggest worry/annoyance was that Lindsey had been the one kicked out, for unfair reasons. See, I'd messaged her the day before about the next oral presentation and she hadn't answered. So first I asked Lisa, the teacher of our section, to confirm. Well, I didn't ask directly whether Lindsey was kicked out, just about the poster presentation. But Lisa confirmed my fear. So I was agitated, going, "But why did John put it like that - what did she do wrong?" "She didn't do anything wrong," comforted Lisa. And, "I can see you're upset about this, so you should probably talk to him." (I will continue this later, I hope; I'm blathing_from_an_airport so my time constraints are related to flying machines that won't wait.) 230626 ... e_o_i To continue: I talked to John, the director, on the porch outside the class building. This building is also a church - like my old school Cedar_Christian_Academy again. Anyway. We're standing in a small concrete area outside the front door, as the others are going off to lunch. I'm nervous. I start off in German, asking if I can speak English. "Yes, certainly," says John, though he's usually the "immer Deutsch" one. I remember holding my hands together, avoiding eye contact. Content: Lisa told me to talk to you about Lindsey. Can I ask you what happened? If you have her consent to share information. He seemed dismissive about the information-sharing-consent part. Not about the idea itself, necessarily, but about Lindsey. "I'll say it whether she wants me to or not." He sounded frustrated. He said how she made a lot of trouble for the class, and it was distracting from the program. Finally he had to send her home because she presented a danger to herself and other students. "But I can't help feel...I know it's not your intention, but I'm worried about, I mean I feel that there's some..." and I said the word "ableism" like a shield, an attempt to hide my nervousness behind an official-sounding banner, but John saw it as an offense. "Don't talk to me about ableism," he went, irritated. "My partner has a disability and I don't appreciate being accused like that." Maybe not so harsh as the above. But I retreated a step so I could feel the wall against my back. I didn't mean to accuse him in particular - or I meant to hide that I was doing that, giving him the benefit of the doubt. At any rate, I wasn't expecting him to snap at me like that. And then he said how she'd given out "detailed death threats" towards other students and he had to protect them. (Later I found there was more nuance to the "threatening" part; it wasn't exactly as he'd described.) (...and I haven't even finished this goddam scene yet, but I bought a ticket for a concert that starts at 7:30 so I should skedaddle.) 240127 what's it to you? who go blather from