i flinch now when my phone gets a mesg
because theres that tiny lift of heart
that gets crushed by the weight of reality
Lemon_Soda And people look at me funny when I say hope is a self made trap and despair is a waste of time.

Feel better.
sab i am tired
of adding to my list

of The Hardest Things I've Ever Had To Do
neesh i dreamt we were all trapped and going to be killed again, i've been having nosebleeds again, didn't get up till 5pm just because i couldn't, and i don't think i can face dinner/people. still, today isn't over yet, let's see if i can make something better of it. i shall pick up a book i love and read it (and make notes on it...) 061105
Syrope why are sundays always so sad? 061105
johnny cash on a sunday morning sidewalk, i'm wishing lord that i was stoned. cuz there's something in a sunday, that makes a body feel alone. 061105
the awful truth watched a man
on the subway
hold a bag of chips
for his boy to eat.
and every time
the boy went
to stuff another chip
into his mouth
his father would
get this awful look
in his eyes and say
"give to daddy"
"give to daddy"
and occasionally
he would grab the kid's
wrist and try to snatch the chip from out of the kid's hand.
but the kid
was strong
he fought his father for those chips.
this kid was maybe 8
the guy was probably 40
it was the saddest thing i had ever seen.
after every failed attempt
the father
would kiss his son
on the top
of the head.
and smile
at me
what's it to you?
who go