im_tired Mahayana of pretending everythings ok [cuz its not] it never is it never will be 020710 ... unhinged . exhausted seems like the best word empty absolutely nothing left exhausted 140805 ... flowerock exhausted is the right word here too. physically and mentally exhausted. I am fortunate to be exhausted as a result of progress in life, but it still brings stress, frustration, brain shortages, and tears... it will be ok, things will calm down and we will grow stronger and smarter. breathe... deeply, slowly... hydrate and take care of ourselves, the body and mind work together. need more sleep. I see a nap in my future, maybe on thursday when I have a day off-ish. mmm sleeep, I miss sleep.... 140805 ... kim9 goodnight 150401 ... unhinged mindless repetition mindless greed it seems like there is nowhere i can go to escape these things. 150401 ... when darkness falls tired of living in this glass_house. it's way too big for me, but not big enough for us. too many white walls. can't touch anything because you'll leave a mark or scratch it. can't lean against the walls. can't sit on the delicate chairs and can't eat at the glass dinner table. things break easily, even those that shouldn't. it's too quiet. we should leave, but it's the fear of leaving that is preventing us from doing so, the comfort of the everyday routine that has us fixed. your job of five years, what has it given you except grief and sorrow? why have you grown so attached to it? we are working our precious hours away to have the privilege to live here, but is this what you really want? can we ever be happy here? 150402 ... when darkness falls of ruminating feeling directionless impostor_syndrome 150402 what's it to you? who go blather from