the_ways_we_said_goodbye unhinged at the airport at the trainstation in the hotel parking lot when we were together it was like always meant something new the leaving was always more urgent there was usually too much distance put between us without any guarantees you would not turn at the door to kiss me goodbye because you didn't want me to see the tears in your eyes you wouldn't turn to let me hug you one last time because the shuttle was leaving you set your jaw you were going to take the bus and the train to the airport all by yourself i stood on the kitchen chair in the window and waved at you talking to you on the phone while you stood at the busstop when the bus finally came and swallowed you up i curled up in my bed and cried i was impulsive you were concrete i miss the way you held me even when i didn't want to be held amo 121113 ... unhinged at the amtrak station you cried first i had been crying for weeks i had imagined the moments so many times it somehow had cushioned the blow until i looked at your face you were trying so hard to stop it your macho pride you shouldn't have been crying in public but you were you pulled me across the armrest of the horribly uncomfortable seats pulled my face to your chest so i couldn't watch you cry when it should have been the other way i got onto the train to seattle to weary to worry 44 hours later there would be a lot of geography between us 121113 what's it to you? who go blather from