cost_benefit_analysis unhinged here somewhere a long time ago, i contemplated the economics of the heart. i have long been plagued by logic, rationality in the face of love. been involved with too many cold calculated people over the years, that see the relationships in their life, platonic and otherwise, as a chess game. or even worse, a capitalistic manipulation of gains and losses. but, i have since come to appreciate rationality in the face of chaos. that a good and thourough analysis of the situation is healthy. 'in all actions may i search my mind, and as soon as delusions arise that endanger myself and others, may i firmly face and avert them' the relief of you not being there is equal to or greater than the relief there used to be from you being there 091112 ... hsg based_on_what what_are_the_priorities 100517 ... hsg cba 100517 ... hsg http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/1442555.stm Smoking is cost-effective, says report 100517 ... unhinged peoples feelings are not supply demand graphs in a theory book 140721 ... flowerock of reaction and action. this morning I cried, that was my reaction to friction and stress between myself and my lover. We're ok, we always are, but I am not sure the value of my tears. I was sincere in my expression and it does help to release that way, but it took up valuable time when time was limited. The value of crying my have been less than the value of the time spent. A leaky uterus can fuzzy up my rationality, too. I need to consider this process of cba in times like that, more than I do now, and to include those I care for who are also effected by my choices. 140721 ... unhinged one easy question: will my freaking out in or about the current situation help anyone involved? if the answer is even a partial no, i try my damnedest not to freak out. 140721 what's it to you? who go blather from