angels_cry Perspective_Of_Soul Now that the paranoid thoughts have been tossed aside like waking up from a dream, i am empty.Empty of all the joy i should have in its absence and filled with confusion as to why things are not better. They are getting worse. I am left with the depression i had before but now with no reason to hide behind. How much i desire for warm white light to mend my broken mind. I want the peace i imagine being there beyond the walls of life.This terrible plan i have that makes me sick but the thought of what shall come after makes it so much more inviting.Even Hell would be better than this.Putting on a brave happy face when i am out when all i can think about is being at home with a blade keeping me company. I want it all to stop. 021005 ... unhinged fragile_world i see their tears too. but people expect you to smile even when you aren't happy so that they don't have to be concerned. he saw the scabs from recent lonely nights with the blade and yelled at me; 'what's that?' 'i don't want to talk about it' 'don't do that'. thanks. i'm sure that will help the next time i'm so alone and dead that i would rather make myself bleed than live like that. 021005 ... squint I'm sorry. 021005 ... ~gez~ the angels wept when god made you the beauty was magnificent now i weep when i dream of you 021006 ... celestias shadow i cry when angels deserve to die 031218 what's it to you? who go blather from