rageholics re_alisma i come from a family of rageholics, who keep their resentment at being asked to sacrifice and surrender on low flame. i seem to turn mine up, up, up to experience acute confusion for awhile and to release. my parents ask that we recognize, recognize, recognize and help them to hold their bitterness. spreading their defeat like butter, we believe, out of fairness, that we, too, can't win. they don't know of my comparing and contrasting, and they don't know that i do know how to grow and abandon. and if i did that, they would feed their flame, again. but it's okay, i won't, i will just sever them at life's end. i justify this because they should have been students and they should have known karmic exhaustion.... i shouldn't be throwing my cards in, though. i, too, continuously feed my flame, and they might work on this "letting go", yet. there's always that distant, abstract hope, which is hard to give up, even, and maybe especially, for them. 100829 ... unhinged i am tired of the people i know dumping, spewing, and vomiting their emotions onto me. he just didn't get how much his confrontational bullshit damaged our relationship. and then when i finally told him that it really hurt me and i was a mess, he has nothing to say. i've been hoping and waiting for him to have nothing to say. now i feel abandoned. oh christ. *sigh* 100829 what's it to you? who go blather from