chicken_soup_for_my_pole Irreverent Lovejoy I was feeling a little lonely, so I walked down Fifth to see if I could scrounge up a street whore. We get to motel room, and she says to me, "I'll do Greek, but it'll cost ya twenty extra." A little tear welled up in my eye, and we both had a little chuckle when I responded with, "Whatever you say, Zorbina." 051110 ... Irreverent Lovejoy I was banging this girl from my Ethics class, whoa, I know, that's what I thought, and I realized I was out of lube. My roommate, who just happened to be walking past my door at the time was like, "Hey man, you can borrow my Land O Lakes. It's slippery and tasty, with none of the trans fats of margarine." Man, now that's a cool roomy. 051110 ... Irreverent Lovejoy Reach arounds: now that's what friends are for. 051110 ... Irreverent Lovejoy Now here's a little tip I learned during my days on the farm. Next time you catch your scrote in the ol' zipper, slap on a little bag balm, it's the stuff they use for cow's udders. Now why didn't I think of that? 051110 ... god now this is a blathe i can sink my teef into 051111 ... Irreverent Lovejoy heart (and groin) warming stuff, ain't it? the best part, these are stories from real-life people, just like you and me. i mean, like this next one, here's this kid from pensacola, ya can't make this stuff up, not like a ween song or something, ya know. touching, no, really touching. --- Father O'Leary said if I helped him clean out his rectory that I would fer shure get into Heaven. I'm only 12, so I don't know how he knows, but when he produced a magic healing balm from his staff I reckened he had a hotline straight to God. 051111 what's it to you? who go blather from