not_myself werewolf Those things of which i can perceive the beginnings and ends of are not my self. What i seek to do in each moment is to justify myself, i clamor to show my soul in it's entirety in a single moment. To strip myself of it and leave it there palpitating so that others may know the vastness of the endeavor i currently am involved in and forgive me or encourage me. But i come to the realization that one full and absolute moment containing all others could never justify my life, for more moments would come, annihilators of the past, and what would it mean to continue to be that self, if each moment was such a combining. It in fact would stifle the very necessary motion of the episodic circumstantial present. Memories are made to be transfigured. Memories are roving reference points. We are in essence able to recreate our lives, though they inform us (amongst other things) how. If it were not for the other things this would be a paradox. But we do not lived in closed systems...at least not in a scope that matters to us. This is the freedom from personality that gives us choice, but it is also what confounds us when we try to find continuity with our past selves. When we try to return to something that is lost, that is only now a memory tainted with the visions before us. I cannot look at the tree the way i did right before or right after she kissed me, although i can know that i am still looking at it after she kissed me. The subtle delineations of memory keep us ever similar but never the same. 020430 ... Tiffa Lovely thoughts, well recieved and understood. 020530 ... megan a wonderful song by john mayer 030113 ... "Not My" Man Well? Who's self is it? 090622 what's it to you? who go blather from