grinning_with_crazy_bitterness farmfish i'm not the man i think i want to be, laughing at the way my sanity stretches like a rubberband pulled too far. i might break and sting your ring finger, so just put me down on the ground. i'm sophomoric. i grieve but i believe better days are coming. 011107 ... unhinged yet you never seem to interpret it correctly. i'm laughing at myself. 011107 ... Casey They are all off somewhere with out me, what else is new. I'll just sit here, I can't wait to get the hell out, away form them and the pain. 011107 ... sabbie thinking beer does strange things and i sat outside on a bright sunny day grinning_with_crazy_bitterness when down floated a beautiful grey feather. i caught it in my hand and stared at it. then a cat with half a pidgion hanging out its mouth fell off the roof above me landed on the grass and streaked off around the shed. and i looked at the feather, all perfect and angelic and i thought about the dead bird and the falling cat and i laughed so hard i fell off the bench 020106 ... phil disruptive 020212 ... qi wen with tar-blackened teeth, driving my mian di around the san_li_tun, looking for a lao_wai fare. beijing is different now, but not me. my beeper is blaring some strain of mozart (tom from arizona told me). the ku gua is just a way to transition from bitter tongue to bitter day. a! ge mer, ni qu nar? 020212 what's it to you? who go blather from