all_ready andrea allowing myself to be this open, this free, this blind to all the consequences & living only in now & hoping it will provide me with enough happiness to make the risk seems a bit less. letting myself go like this is something i've never done before. and never in this way. im riding the coattails of emotion. going with what feels right & totally abandoning all decisive thought. fearing the miles about to spread through my life, dividing me with the one thing that could finally make me REAL. allowing myself to be this open, this free, this blind to what could happen.....it isn't something i'd do for just anyone or anything. there's something promising in the air. all i can do is let go and let time take me where i'm supposed to be. i just pray it's next to you. copyright 2000 000102 ... jennifer I know now that I don't understand things in time. Like the victim who's brain doens't register the gun pointed at her, until the bullet has entered her chest. But maybe I do understand, but am far too hesitant (game) to go any further than my soul deams worthy of going. I place myself out in the world, and patiently wait to be hurt. If this were a perfect world, my heart would never be shut off as it has been for so long. If this were a perfect world, I would know my true soul-mate. If this were a perfect world, I would never have to worry about being loved. If this were a perfect world... 000228 ... happy yappy chris is beautiful 040409 what's it to you? who go blather from