souvenir birdmad this i take with me this will remind me 010126 ... celestias_shadow i took you from the shelf covered in a soft grey skin of dust lonely and introverted you were waiting for someone to come and pick you up i took a chance you over the bright and gaudy beads and pencils and chocolates that lined the walls and i took you the moth among a thousand glittering butterflies and you my souvenir are the diamond in the rough 030303 ... neesh someone asked me "is she your every waking thought?", and for a while i thought i was lying when i said yes, but then i started paying more attention to my totally random internal dialogue, which has a habit of making connections and cross-references, and i realised that practically every thought i had led me through a reminder of her, but because it was so incongruously relevant and natural a thought to have in my head, i didn't even notice. so while i may not have always been consciously thinking of her, it turned out i thought about her every other second, at least, in relation to whatever i was meant to be thinking about. but now, because i started paying attention to my thoughts, whenever something reminds me of someone, it reminds me of being reminded of her, eg the sleek black cat on my calendar reminds me of hilda, nina's cat, but instead of being reminded of nina, the act of being reminded makes me think of her instead. whenever she reads something clever she tells me it reminds her of me, but the other day she said of a short poem: "made me think of u... or me" 030623 what's it to you? who go blather from