how_my_mind_works (_) i hate that my parents have so much control over me. i want privacy. i wish they'd leave me alone. but they can't, because i can't fucking dress or bathe myself goddamnit. i will never be able to. if i tried to hide i would just fucking rot away. it's always, always going to be like this, my parents [or someone else, my mom's a scapegoat anyway] will always have the upper hand. and i'll just cry about it, even though i don't want to, it makes my feel like a shithead. but i'm never going to change[if i could change it would be better], i'm never going to stop bitching to everyone about it [even though it's such an exercise in futility] BECAUSE IT SUCKS. it's just going to get worse. i'll just get more and more stiff and more and more bitchy, and my parents will get older and older until they finally let me out of the box into adulthood, but i'll still be trapped in my mind. i'll have no friends and nothing i enjoy anymore. no life. hardly worth writing about, so i don't want to be there. i just want to sleep and stare at the wall for the rest of my life. yeah. shit, i hate this. 051214 what's it to you? who go blather from