feeling_lost
gay gizmo
I'll
never
be
what
I
strive
for
.
And
I
hate
myself
for
that
.
I
want
something
to
die
for
.
And
I
hate
myself
for
that
.
I
feel
so
lost
.
So
alone
.
So
deep
in
a
dark
dingy
alley
.
I
feel
so
sick
of
running
towards
something
that
I
can
sense
,
but
never
see
,
and
never
touch
.
Goals
are
always
set
,
but
the
task
of
reaching
them
has
yet
to
commence.
Fear
of
failure
leaves
me
stalled.
Leaves
me
alone
.
Will
leave
me
on
my
deathbed,
alone
and
unsucesful.
Life
will
pass
me
by
without
a
glance
.
Will
I
never
give
myself
to
someone
and
find
that
it
was
right
?
Questions
of
my
future
leave
me
too
stunted
to
do
anything
about
them
.
I'm
sinking
in
quicksand
.
The
more
I
struggle
the
faster
I
go
.
The
faster
I
go
,
the
more
panicked
I
become
.
The
more
panicked
I
become
the
deeper
I
get
.
There
is
no
onenear.
No
one
to
hear
my
cries
.
My
pleas
echo
only
in
my
head
.
The
chills
of
manic
madness
paralyze
my
soul
.
Leave
my
body
drained
of
hope
.
I
fear
that
I
am
already
dead
.
How
could
I
be
alive
knowing
that
my
death
means
nothing
in
the
grandest scheme
of
things
?
Is
that
not
worse
than
death
?
021009
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from