a_year_of_dying gotta get away. http://www.deviantart.com/view/6535223/ frozen in time. 050803 ... iNsEcUrE_GoTh_GiRl when i should have been living. a year of dying when i should have been trying new things, not clinging to old. a year of dying when i should have been doing more than just existing more than just living a shadow of a life your life when i should have been creating my own life, my own personality when i should have just embraced the thing that terrified me most, the thing i most did not want to do. when i should have severed those stupid ideas and not withered the past year away. when i should have realised that my fear had already happened. it happened a year ago. a year of dying, of wasted regrets and tears, of melodrama and self importance. a year that i could have enjoyed more. maybe maybe not. no regrets, right. 050803 ... unhinged or three or five i've analyzed these things to the point of absurdity and any solution i can come up with just seems to lead to more shit. my medicated brain won't form any more thoughts on this. 050803 ... pushpins happy anniversary. I wanted to take you sky diving but I just don't have the money. I could have dealt with either or both of our accidental sky diving deaths just fucking fine. It is ending. 050803 what's it to you? who go blather from