i_gave_birth_to_a_sperm_whale
Extract
It
is
shameful
even
to
speak
of
my
enormous
aquatic progeny
but
speak
I
must
.
Eighteen
months
in
labour
and
growning
bigger
all
the
time
,
the
elasticity
of
my
womb
stretched
to
breaking
point
.
there
seemed
no
hope
for
either
of
us
.
It
was
biblical
prophecy
that
it
should
be
so
.
This
was
of
no
comfort
to
me
in
my
agony
.
Finally
,
with
the
application
of
a
lubricant
gleaned
from
the
still
beating
hearts
of
disappointed
ballet
dancers
my
child
was
born
into
the
thames estuary.
She
never
looked
back
.
010622
...
DannyH
Three
things
occur
to
me
.
There
is
no
particular
order
.
When
we
fall
over
,
one
of
two
things
can
happen
,
only
one
of
them
is
funny
.
Danny
,
why
don't
you
just
go
to
bed
like
normal
people
do
...?
011019
...
DannyH
The
final
hurdle
is
always
the
hardest
.
Clouds
of
guilt
hang
around
it
like
fog
.
Stumbling
over
the
barrier
I
suddenly
found
I
was
naked
.
The
crowd
filtered
out
of
the
auditorium.
"
Come
back
and
congratulate
me
for
having
had
the
courage
to
fail
you
bastards
."
011201
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from
