no_control whitechocolatewalrus lost in the night. searching for the way, a way to proceed. down the lane and into the day away from danger no_control no_motivation lost in the day. searching for the way, a way to live. down the lane and into life. no_control. no_destination. 031201 ... whitechocolatewalrus over the way i feel. 031216 ... nomatter i have been crying for six hours now i just keep replaying his words in my head each time i make him sound more awful but i love him and i just wish he could understand. 031217 ... Death of a Rose over the landslides I have instigated, i can only try to tumble to the the safety of the trailing edge. 031217 ... Syrope so i'm thinking i should prepare myself just in case tomorrow goes badly and i say to myself, "self, don't go in expecting such big things...you should really be expecting the worst_case" but then brain just, stopped and it was an empty feeling when you realize you can't imagine anything worse than what you have at the moment, you know it's starting. or happening again 050209 what's it to you? who go blather from