got_milk Jus God, I’m sad at 3am. Is bleeding heart the right term? I feel too much. It’s human, I suppose, to be unsatisfied with the world. I don’t mean my microcosm of the world, I literally mean this massive entity that grows ever more powerful; that we soak our shirts with sweat to uphold. Sociopaths, if you didn’t know already, run the world. We discussed it in one of my psych classes. They run. The. World. Let that percolate for a minute. And there’s nothing we can do about it unless we ourselves become sociopaths. Yikes. When I’m not occupied with that revelation, I’m inundated with the constant churn of industry that tortures, exploits, and murders millions of animals per DAY. And I am unpleasantly surprised by the lack of people who are not similarity afflicted by this knowing. I’m more disappointed in myself though, for not abstaining. For failing at fighting as hard as I should. But who am I? I’m nobody. Up until last week I was an insufferable vegan. Now I’m a lowly vegetarian, responsible for a million moms losing their babies so I can consume and, regrettably, feel better physically and mentally. Sometimes maybe I do wish I were a sociopath. Or that I still drank. Anything to stop the world from spinning for a while. Sleep, perhaps 250824 ... epitome of incomprehensibility For what it's worth, I think you're being an "ecological hero," as my dad says, even if you can't cut out animal products entirely. Right now, I'm only plant_based insofar as I eat less meat than average, but it would be better if I was like my cousin and his partner in the country. Their meat is from local farms or their own hunting, but the bulk of their food is veggies that they grow themselves. Okay, yes, that'd be hard to do in this airplane-ridden suburb. I admit I don't know what the farms are like where my brands of milk come from - Lactantia and Natrel. Canada tends to be strict about food safety, but does that mean the animals are well looked after or just treated as means to an end...? I don't get a lot of milk either, but that's more to be economical than ecological: since I get the lactase-added ones because I find lactose hard to digest, it costs more. Back to Jus - a probably unnecessary warning, but if you're looking into milk from small and/or local farms, I'd just advise heating it up to get rid of germs if you suspect it's not already pasteurized. (I didn't sick from illegal_milk that one time in Arden - I suspect Sue talked Isaac out of that trend, or maybe it was just that the guy who supplied it moved away - but there's a greater risk of harmful bacteria if it stays unpasteurized.) 250826 ... Jus Unfortunately, dairy farms (even small dairy farms) have some of the worst practices in animal agriculture. If you’re a mom, it hits even harder. Imagine being impregnated unwillingly, carrying a baby to term, having that baby, and then it being taken away from you so you can be strapped to a machine all day for milk. But what’s even worst than that is the baby, chained to a little box in rows with other babies, cries for its mom while not getting any affection or freedom. The viable females will grow up to be like their moms, to produce milk, and the males will be slaughtered for veal. It makes me sick. The issue for me is that I have about 1000 eating disorders and am surrounded by meat eaters. I have to cook for 3 other people who have different diets. I live in a city where it’s tough to go out and be vegan. I’m doing my best but it’s not enough. Literally nothing any of us are doing is enough. Oh but Taylor Swift is getting married… 250827 ... ovenbird I relate to this so much Jus! When I was pregnant with my first baby I was constantly researching things related to farming practices and became extremely distressed about dairy cows in particular. I wanted to become a vegan but my partner had gluten intolerance and it didn't seem possible to manage a vegan diet without gluten. He was also completely unwilling to give up meat. Now my kids are older and extremely picky eaters and without meat and dairy they would probably just let themselves starve. So, like you, I live in this constant state of cognitive dissonance. I don't actually want to eat meat or dairy products and the reality of the way we torture animals for food rips my heart to shreds but the reality of having to feed a family with complex dietary needs and getting children to eat anything at all means that veganism or even vegetarianism is too logistically difficult to manage. I try to minimize my own meat and dairy consumption but I often beat myself up for not having the strength to give it up completely. I think you should be really proud of yourself for what you ARE managing. It's not easy to be a vegetarian in a world of meat eaters and there are a million reasons why veganism may not be individually sustainable (or even vegetarianism for that matter). You care about the plight of animals and are doing what you reasonably can to minimize their suffering. (These are the things I tell myself when my brain spins painfully on the same topics). There are no easy black and white answers but I admire your dedication to minimizing harm and also your ability to recognize that your mental and physical health need to be a priority too, even if that means compromising a little on your core values. It's a tough balance to strike. Anyway, I'll stop rambling but I resonated with so much of what you said here. 250827 ... Jus You worded it perfectly! There’s gluten and fillers and other things in a lot of vegan food and our world really isn’t set up for us to live that way. Now, if I were rich and had acreages on Hawaii, then I could rock a raw vegan diet. But alas, I’m in the buttcrack of Canada desperately searching for anything organic and in my price range. And you’re right, I think even just acknowledging it as opposed to actively hating vegans is something. Thank you for the validation. It feels really good that I’m not alone in the cognitive dissonance abyss. :) 250827 ... ovenbird I think any actions we can take to reduce suffering are meaningful. We don't have to be perfect to make a difference. If everyone could be convinced to reduce animal product consumption, even a little, just imagine how much change could happen! 250827 what's it to you? who go blather from