it's_what_kept_me_occupied_in_english
2 1/2 wise cracks
Here
are
several
very
important
but
often
forgotten
rules
of
English
:
Avoid
alliteration
.
Always
.
Prepositions
are
not
words
to
end
sentences
with
.
Avoid
cliches
like
the
plague
.
They're
old
hat
.
Employ
the
vernacular.
Eschew
ampersands &
abbreviations
,
etc
.
Parenthetical
remarks
(however
relevant
)
are
unnecessary
.
It
is
wrong
to
ever
split
an
infinitive
.
Contractions
aren't
necessary
.
Foreign
words
and
phrases
are
not
apropos
.
One
should
never
generalize.
Eliminate quotations.
As
Ralph
Waldo
Emerson
once
said
, "
I
hate
quotations.
Tell
me
what
you
know
."
Comparisons
are
as
bad
as
cliches
.
Don't
be
redundant
.
Don't
more
use
words
than
necessary
.
It's
highly
superfluous
.
Profanity
sucks
shit
.
Be
more
or
less
specific
.
Understatement
is
always
best
.
Exaggeration
is
a
billion
times
worse
than
understatement
.
One
-word
sentences
? Eliminate.
Analogies
in
writing
are
like
feathers
on
a
snake
.
The
passive
voice
is
to
be
avoided
.
Go
around
the
barn
at
high
noon
to
avoid
colloquialisms.
Even
if
a
mixed
metaphor
sings
,
it
should
be
derailed.
Who
needs
rhetorical
questions
?
010209
...
kx21
Given
any
rule
,
one
can
always
find
some
shits
,
or
more
precisely
imperfection
in
It
.
This
is
so
called
the
beauty
of
Nature
or
the
Mother
Nature
of
U
...
010209
what's it to you?
who
go
blather
from