speculation sphinxradio i drive myself insane by thinking too much. scenario 1: X loves Y, but i love X, and Y is reveling in the power she's holding in her evil hands scenario 2: X loves me, but doesn't want to hurt Y by following through on what he really wants scenario 3: Z loves me. X loves me. i am a goddess. scenario 4: X hates me. Z doesn't know who i am. i am a loser. i love all of you. especially you. too much speculation makes the truth seem that much more unlikely, somehow. 011105 ... ClairE I'm too lazy to think about what could have happened. I just beat myself up over what I didn't do. Always what I didn't do. Never what I did. 011220 ... cube Navel gazing. Snap out of it! ... 011221 ... 8 well i guess it's all true, but fuck. 041024 ... andru235 so many declarations are merely a form of this (present declaration included?!?) "the speculation of independence" 050310 ... bcd wots your name? sorry??? ummmmm... come on, be a MAN 071117 what's it to you? who go blather from