shoplifting PeeT and so there i was raking leaves, earbuds in place, listening to marc maron interview jillian lauren, when i see a woman walking down a one way alley talking so loud on her phone i can almost hear what she is saying. got to hear this i think and free my ears. of course now she goes silent. she must be listening, but i manage to capture one vitriolic word:"shoplifting." 111214 ... raze she told me she had this move she called the vacuum_cleaner. she would wear a sweater with sleeves that were long enough to swallow her fingers, and with her hidden hands she would suck up whatever she wanted. she didn't say what she stole. just that she never got caught. 240309 ... ancasa.reyn i delivered newspapers as a kid and next door to the substation where we picked up our papers was a family-run grocery store most days we had to wait for the delivery truck to arrive with our day's work so most days meant popping into the store for a snack one day possibly because i was impressed with others shoplifting goodies i slipped a package of slim jims down my pants suddenly and seemingly out of nowhere a hand reached down my pants to grab the ill-gotten bootie and suddenly i was in the back office at a desk where a telephone sat the manager asked me if he should call the police or my mom and i told him the police i have not tried to shoplift since although i did buy a shoplifted copy of the woodstock soundtrack from a fellow newspaper carrier 250728 ... epitome of incomprehensibility Josephine was an interesting character, but I was primed to think badly of her at the beginning of tenth grade, my first year at FACE school. She'd snapped at me for leading her up the wrong staircase - the long way around to wherever a group of us were going. Why didn't I take the shorter way? I was new in the school, that's why. I didn't know the shorter way. So I resented that. ... That was no doubt part of my moral dilemma about accepting her stolen mints. See, Josephine had shoplifted the roll of white Mentos from a dépanneur, or so she bragged. Now she was friendly to all at the table, offering mints freely, apparently forgiving or forgetting that I'd wasted a bit of her time by steering her wrong a few days earlier. Was I going down the wrong path now, tempted by the sweets of sin? Will ill-gotten Mentos explode if you mix them with conflicted feelings?? Nope. For a short time I savored the fast-dissolving thing. Then it was gone. No slippery slide to the depths of debauchery. No best-friending, either, but at least a cease of minor hostilities. 250801 what's it to you? who go blather from