telephone fallen no...no, there is no problem.....just wouldn't want to be responsible for another death....would feel guilt if you were on the phone with me...driving...resulting in a bloody mess....done making new friends.....not just talking about random people...talking about the "us" not the "them"... lovers sharers of secrets strong shoulders warm hearts ...can't get it back....it isn't normal to loose this many people this close to you this often... car crashes shootings overdoses (accidental and otherwise) on one occasion death resulted from a broken ankle ...all of a sudden Friday night's plans are very different...you find yourself at the gatherings...the funerals....wondering who will be next.... no longer able to stomache the feeling of looking into the mother's/fiance's/son's/etc.'s eyes and verbalize the expression "so sorry for your loss"... espcially when not all that long ago you were on that side of it.... too many fellow revellers of this party called life.... a 10 year stretch of loosing an average of at least 2 people every 6 months due to strange deaths.... the ringer on the phone permanently turned off due to a certain 3 week period of every single time the phone rang.....another person lost.... "the ringer is turned off because I hate the way it sounds....you have to speak into the machine..." not exactly the "real" reason... you run out of black outfits you loose the ability to cry you loose the ability to cry...you just get angry you can't cry.... you just get angry 020905 ... silentbob yum` i wish i knew what inspired this 040127 ... crOwl i know what inspired this. i don't answer the fone anymore. 040127 ... guitar_freak Part 1 the payphone was ringing and i looked around and answered it. "hello" "hi, im calling from the blah blah blah association and was wondering if you could take a survey" "sure" so off the lady goes asking me how i feel about my body. I tell her the truth. Part 2 The lady gets a guy on the phone through random dialing shit and asks him the same questions while I listen to his answers. I am asked to comment on his answers and I do. Part 3 The lady put both of us on so that we each could hear what the other had to say. She proceeded to ask me about sex, my favorite position, masturbation, and what an orgasm felt like. She asked what was the easiest way for me to orgasm. good freakin lord. I answered her questions honestly. The guy was asked the same things and I listened to his answers. I felt like I was stuck in a weird phone-sex vortex of some kind. Here I was talking about very intimate things on the phone with two strangers and all I did was answer the fuckin payphone. So weird. 040225 ... nomme nodding in agreement weird 040225 ... nom i hung up on my mom last night i called her back and she hung up on me we talked later and apologized to eachother and just as i typed this my mom called 070223 ... raze i used to have such long conversations on the phone that my right ear would hurt when i hung up, and its ability to process sound would be cut in half for a while. i never knew whispers in the dark could carry so much weight. that intimacy doesn't seem to exist anymore. whenever i see someone with a phone now, they're looking for invisible candy or surfing the internet while ignoring their child or the dog they're supposed to be walking. even when they're talking, it's little more than a breathless monologue. people have forgotten how to speak and how to listen. not everyone. but almost. it's a shock now when i can see in someone's eyes that they're with me, and what i have to say matters to them. once, i could hear it in their voices too. 240119 what's it to you? who go blather from