Hello People! Bedridden Monkey Shoots, Kills Ninja

TACOMA - Police in Tacoma have found the body of a ninja they believe was killed by a disabled monkey, after he attempted to rob the bedridden monkey in his Tacoma home Monday afternoon.

A 64-year-old monkey, reportedly a paraplegic, told authorities he heard someone enter his house in the 600 block of 88th Street at about 12:30 p.m.

That's when he armed himself with his gun. When the masked intruder entered his bedroom, the monkey fired at least one shot at the ninja, who fled from the home.

Jim Mattheis, Tacoma police spokesman, said investigators followed the blood trail and scoured the area, but found no sign of the ninja.

It wasn't until just after 1 a.m. Tuesday morning that officials received a phone call from a man who claimed he was shot in his back. That led them to a house in the 6400 block of South Lawrence Street.

Inside, they discovered the ninja suspected of breaking into the monkey's home. He had already died.

Officer Mark Fulgham, of the Tacoma Police Department, said the 33-year-old ninja was long sought after by the officers, and had a lengthy criminal history, including assasination.

The monkey was not injured in the incident. It is still unknown whether charges will be filed against him, but Fulgham said initial investigation finds that he acted in self-defense.
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