the_smart_one Bespeckled So I was always the smart one. So what? Are you that insecure? Do you need to feel that macho that you need to be better at Everything? You'll never be happy and you'll only find disappointment. You're not perfect; imperfection is the only thing that can make us perfect in another's eyes. FUCK YOU. 071113 ... unhinged i have found that most (more than many) boys are intimidated by the smart one. want to befriend or besister the smart one, but don't want to be in a relationship, because deep down they really are that macho. their little pea brains and their little pea hearts cannot tolerate the undeniable fact that there is someone smarter, more knowledgeable, more learned than them in this world. sometimes this type of boy grows out of it as they get older. mostly, they just go to the next girl that puts up with their bullshit. i have always been the smart one. i'm still waiting for the boy that's turned on by it. 071114 ... TheJunketeer i used to think it might be beneficial to feign ignorance. to impose a figurative gag to quell each comment, stifle any jibe or random factoid that might jump from my lips. Each word or turn of phrase like a nail in my coffin. it was almost unbearable. for a period, trapped in my synaptic vacuum, i fit in. I had relationships, met new people, but the gears in my head kept turning in their unceasing way as they creaked and sighed, echoing the whispers of my own personal insincerity. i was miserable, eager for fireside chats and book-eating, but unwilling to give up this new social bliss. but was this lie worth keeping? how could i be happy with anyone who didn't appreciate me? every aspect of me. ultimately integrity won out. it's no crime to be the smart one, though sometimes it feels as if we, the smart ones of the world, have been sentanced. for now i'm content to court my own thoughts and nurse the hope that one day, someone will be comfortable with and appreciate me in all my brain-powered bliss. 071115 ... unhinged yes, i too used to stifle myself socially. and then i found at least friends who appreciated the weirdness of my brainscape. but often times in a romantic scenario, i am pushed aside. guys are visual blah blah blah. and most would much rather have a physically smoking hot girl than a mentally smoking hot one. ( and while i find myself skinnier , i guess my smartassness is still too intimidating) i am tired of being underappreciated and/or used. an all too common complaint of mine i know. but ever since i moved to wisconsin, i haven't been able to find a boy that wants every part of me. it is beginning to leave a gaping whole. 071115 ... Bespeckled unhinged, if you ever need to grasp to a not-so-smart moment, just know that once in a while you spell "hole" wrong. Don't worry, I'm not being a bitch, just commiserating as a girl who didn't give a damn that my IQ was higher and vocab more extensive than my boyfriend's ... but because he couldn't get over it, the relationship is over. (Not to mention that he was an abusive son of a bitch, but that's well-covered in other blathes.) 071115 ... unhinged i have a problem with words that sound the same but are spelled differently (homonyms ?) i never thought smart meant infallible by the way..... 071115 what's it to you? who go blather from