pushed raze he let me borrow a tape by a band i didn't know well enough to understand. i shoved a shitty magnetic pickup in the mouth of an acoustic guitar that wasn't mine and plugged it into my tube amp. he sat behind the drums. we played part of a song shannon wrote after a gig in a converted church in detroit. from a dressing room window he watched a crowd gather and stare at a woman on the twentieth floor of a hotel beside the club. some people heckled her and told her to jump. so she did. he wanted to look away. his body wouldn't let him. she was twenty-six years old. she could have been anyone. gillian came to pick us up on her way to a halloween party. she was dressed like an angel. i gave her money for gas before she took us where we needed to go. then i drank myself into a dream and wondered how long it would take for me to fall if i jumped too. 230404 what's it to you? who go blather from