where_my_head_is
tessa Places at home keep popping into my head, for no reason, seemingly at random. I have decided to start recording them.


Today:
Todman Ave, Kensington. On the racecourse side, looking towards the park.
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jane june 2005 on the back of a motorcycle 080325
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tessa Earlier this week it was Bondi Jn, Oxford street mall looking up the street towards the city.

Today it has been all over the place.
First: Liverpool St near George St, looking towards Makoto sushi train.
Then: In the Dandenong ranges
Then: In SGHS, in the hallway near the school office.

I have not idea what this is about, why I keep getting these places. Is it something my brain is trying to hold on to / let go of / recreate?
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tessa I think I'm homesick 080405
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tessa Sitting on x's balcony, drinking tea, looking at the coloured flags, discussing... what? everything, nothing 080405
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tessa I've been in the Rocks, and on Anzac Pde outside school and in Kensington and in Bondi Jn and at Eastgardens and in Ultimo near the dog park.

It's flooding in. It's like my eye memory is rifling back through all the old files, checking the quality, checking the records.
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tessa Ocean Ave, under the trees 080530
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birdmad somewhere quiet, cloudy and cool 080530
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unhinged swimming in the sea of shit that is blue these days 080530
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tessa Under a mang tree, in an backyard of a real Queenslander house on Wylie St, Brisbane. 080602
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tessa mango 080602
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unhinged the confidence to take the audition
the ambition to get it ready
the guts to make it fucking happen already

i'll do it
they'll see
fuck you and your mom
for hating on me
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tessa I went home

and suddenly my head was in London
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no reason it's wondering why nothing works out for some people
why things fall into place so much more easily for some than for others
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no reason maybe some people's heads are just too all over the place all the time 081006
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tessa my head as been all over Sydney this last week.

The food court under my old office building (why there? i've never consciously thought about that place before)

A Darlinghurst cafe

The Library Lawn at uni

why do these places suddenly pop into my head? A smell? A word? A feeling?

I don't know what it is, but it has the effect of making place and space merge, into one long, connected experience
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jane {the Echo} 090511
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unhinged i had a dream right before i woke up that a boy by the name of 'frank buddha' left me a note in my mailbox at work about how he was in_love with me and in the dream when i tried to recall frank buddha's face it was a dirty drunk construction worker i met at a friends' show years ago....


they say hugs rewire our neurotransmitters to/for happiness. science confirming what i already knew thanks to frank....i need good regular hugs.
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past not quite screwed on right 090511
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raze somewhere south of the border, wondering what i've gotten myself into, but at the same time not really sweating it that much. 090511
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belly fire having difficulty letting petty things go today
feeling like everyone is the enemy
and wishing I could just lighten up already
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tessa Botany street, kensington.
Near the BP
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unhinged the prescience of that dream slightly eerie a month later:


my head is in the clouds
remembering his face
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tessa Elizabeth street, Hyde park corner, outside looking towards the courts 090708
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raze in a vase
absorbing water
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tessa Anzac parade 090921
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raze so far up my own posterior, i may never see light again. 090921
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zedel randwick, near the grocery store where mum used to buy me chocolate freckles 090927
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n o m making stir-fry the other day on acid, i reached into the carrot bag and felt my hands in my head, as if my head was the bag 090927
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n o m or rather as if the bag was in my head 090927
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cr0wl floating like a balloon somebody let go 090927
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birdmad listening to the pixies on the ground
(with my feet in the air)
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tessa Newtown near X's house.

And then, strangely, Leichardt Street in Melbourne
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tessa why has it stopped?
why haven't I posted here in over a year?
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raze buried beneath wet snow. 240103
what's it to you?
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