insouciant raze the passion and music of your words push against the meaning of your chosen name, reminding me we're always more than we think we are. i'm glad you're here. 220719 ... insouciant mortally yours, my friend 220719 ... Bizzar raze, i knew i could count on you to start this thread. you have such a way with your words, and with seeing people. and you nailed this during the time i was taking to come up with my own words to put here. sometimes there are so many things that could be said that there are none. in just over a week, you have shown a kindness and understanding that are unparalleled to... really anything i have ever experienced. leaving both of us, i think, wondering if it can be real. it's really something to ponder... that you can spend a great deal of time knowing someone at surface, only to be be blown away by their depths in the span of just a few days. and your depths are vast and breath taking. veiled only by the insouciant mask that keeps you safe from the rest of the world. i am so thankful that you've lifted it for me. allowed me to see that you. i am also glad you're here. in more ways than one. 220719 ... insouciant Once bleak, a rainbow. I'm safe. 220719 ... Bizzar stay with me. 220721 ... insouciant share my disease 220721 ... Bizzar i never want to stay. do you? you do? me too. 220721 ... insouciant because there’s no one left to save your soul on the way down 220722 ... Bizzar i hope that i ascend to you to who? always you. 220722 ... insouciant Gotta find a way back home 220723 ... Bizzar spark. 220723 ... insouciant ember 220726 ... Bizzar always you. 220727 ... Bizzar it’s on your skin now. now the world will know that your beauty has risen from the ashes of all who tried to hold you down. 220913 ... insouciant I will not beat myself up for the times when I have needed to burn myself to ashes to start again 220918 ... raze (i've missed reading your words. it's always good to see you here.) 230217 ... Bizzar i can't remember when the first time we met was. or how much time fell between that moment and when our conversations began. but i know it has been just under a year since you messaged me about art. and to think about it in those empty, black and white limitations of time seems... almost unnerving. because i feel like we have lived lifetimes already. if you stand back and look at us as individuals, and as friends. the length we have traveled, the terrain we have overcome, the storms, the cold, the dark. how much less dark there is now. i can still remember a time when we sank into the dark beside each other so often it felt like baseline. and i watched the frequency drop for both of us. i have watched myself grow stronger, fear less, take more chances, learn to be unapologetically me and let that me be visible to more and more people. and you. i have watched you step out of your shell. slowly. just to take a peek at the world outside. to eventually stepping completely out and wondering how the hell you had lived so long inside of it. i have watched you shed trauma. make connections. scary connections. hard connections. i've watched you face them all. make new discoveries. learn and relearn yourself. and the time matters, not. it doesn't matter if one week you have made leaps and bounds in progress and other weeks you're frozen in yourself, paralyzed, wondering how you got there and where you can possibly go from here. it's all progress. it all matters. and i will love you through all of it. stay with me 230531 ... insouciant Share my disease 230606 ... raze sometimes i feel like none of my words amount to much of anything. like i'm just shouting into the void until my voice gives out. thank you for reminding me it isn't so. and thank you for inking your love and pain, your joy and despair on these red walls. this place will never forget you. neither will i. 230613 ... raze (it's good to have you back again. you've been missed.) 230920 what's it to you? who go blather from