albert gja I knew him well whilst he was here. Actually I say well but I am not sure if anyone will ever know Albert well. You see I call him he, but he was almost without gender – he lacked that…intent. He just enjoyed the company I think – does that make sense? He was soft and delicate and a little puffy. He had skin that stays white after you push it – waiting for the blood to return. He seemed oblivious to his surrounds but that is not to imply {infer...correct this time?} that he did not care. He almost cared too much and that made him cautious. There was almost this, how do I say it, bulk that got in the way. And when combined with his too late sense of his own presence he sort of well – was just there. More than amorphous even. Oh dear that all sounds nasty. Far from it. He engaged with us; he was witty and interested, wanted more, thirsty, oh so thirsty and not bad on the tooth either. But generous – always paid his way, actually I think I might owe him. (Ssshhh – he’ll get embarrassed if I offer). Plus he slept well, snored even. So unashamed, lovely in his lust for life more so is the search for repose. IF there was a lean to be had…Albert had it. We could all do with an Albert. But none of that can cloud my fear of him. Strange isn’t it that he could be terrifying as well. I won’t dwell there if you don’t mind – it just, oh I don’t know, adds an edge that’s gone now. I mean it would be hard to prove he was ever here let alone had malevolent intent. Everyone speaks so highly of him – they marvel at such a mellifluous… well marvel. He was just such a…context, really. Just so accommodating of wills. Just so happy to oblige that I couldn’t help wonder if there was something I was missing. Some more I had to give; some price I owed him. A price to pay for knowing him. I don’t know. He left on an aeroplane. Well actually, to be fair, I’m not sure he made it aboard. He got as far as the airport – I know that much. The farewell phone call from the departure lounge will live long in my memory and glands but I fear it is a little blue to describe here if you get my drift. Sometimes now he sends postcards from beyond. They are from places unknown and rarely explored – if you follow the travel guides as I do. I don’t know if he is really there though. I have absolutely no reason to believe he is not, but…. Look I don’t know, it feels someone might be posting those cards for him. But why should I doubt him – he struck me as completely incapable of being anything but honest. So I wonder what I will say when, if, I meet him again. I can’t even be sure I will recognise him. But then, I think that I will. I mean, I didn’t think I would the last time I had the pleasure, but then, and well, we went on to be – entwined. Not sure if that is the right word but, oh I don’t know. So here’s to Albert. A smile, a raised glass, a tuneless song. Wherever you are: I love you. I owe you more than you will ever know. 100908 ... ljr i sat next to just such a fellow once, not long ago in fact. we were on a very long haul flight together, and spent a good part of it in conversation. he was just as you describe. do you think it at all possible that he be the very same albert? that would be quite a coincidence, wouldn't it? i think i will believe he is. and that being the case, i can tell you exactly where he is. he is where i am, rather close by in fact. we speak from time to time, a casual acquaintance has grown into quite a friendship. should I mention you to him? pass on a message? tell me. 100916 ... rt red australia 100917 ... gja Yes. Please remember me to him. Although, vainly I suppose, I cannot believe he has forgotten. Mention that I think of him often, and dependant on whether your friendship allows frankness: a little inappropriately sometimes too. Can you tell him something for me? Can you tell him that his optimism has infected me on, I am starting to believe, an almost permanent basis. And then try to explain that optimism may be the wrong word. His way of well, how shall I say - knowing – may be closer. Yes that is it. Knowing. And then Albert will probably laugh that jolly verging on indulging yet dismissive laugh and say….not so fast mister bond, not so fast. Oh I don’t know. What will he say? Tell me. 101013 what's it to you? who go blather from