flight amy maybe again, someday. the more the ground, the more the sky. 020806 ... kerry taking gliding moving forward moving anywhere i fear the stagnant, the too-still lift me up i’m ready i packed light, only the necessities bag full of books and snacks and blank paper waiting patiently for me (is it so bad to wear the same clothes over and over?) i always take pictures of the clouds right as we break through—clouds over utah, clouds over mount baker, clouds over the sea and usually i delete them much later maybe that’s what keeps me so hungry for the sky and flight and movement but you can’t hold a cloud 210829 ... kerry i like to say "i hate flying" but that's not entirely true. there are only certain aspects i hate. my backpack's always too heavy no matter what i sacrifice but once i'm here, past security, my mood lifts. i love the feeling of emerging into the gate, all the antsy people waiting, nearly frantic to get on our plane, maybe wondering like i do who is coming home and who is passing through? i get a little charge searching for the signs, navigating, a feeling of independence and drive i don’t always have: e gate that way, b gate 1 through 5 that way. departures and arrivals: the lists of destinations are dizzying and dazzling. a lactation station that looks like a giant toaster. rushing in my clogs and joggers and chomsky shirt, the glide of my suitcases wheels along the smooth floor, darting between people, along the wall, left and right, Pardon, 'Scuse me, geez have these people ever left their house before? this is a society! i don't mind killing time at an airport bar. i don’t drink anymore but on an afternoon or evening layover i’d hop up on a stool and cradle my bags with my feet and calves, take a look around... he looks like he’s been here a while. she looks like a business traveler. who else besides a flight attendant wears heels and hose on a flight?? that guy clearly just wants to eat in peace and everyone else can fuck off. and i’m thinking Those Two just met; she’s laughing the type of laugh for someone you don’t know but maybe we could get close right now, two people, a fleeting encounter... he buys her another glass of wine. i delight in the beep of the scanner on my boarding pass and the “thanks, miss” as i ramble down the breezeway, a mix of fear and excitement stirring. who will sit beside me? once i next to a ghost hunter. once next to a medical student going to visit his father in lahore. and once a woman who barely made it onto the plane, who was going to rural estonia to find her missing travel writer husband. but usually we don’t speak. 210829 ... kerry to be continued, typos be damned! 210829 what's it to you? who go blather from