televangelism raze sometimes when my sleep is all out of whack i watch televangelists on tv late at night, for as long as i can stomach it. they make me laugh, and they scare the hell out of me. i think any given person should be free to believe in or pray to whatever/who(m)ever they want, without fear of persecution. as long as they're not hurting anyone in the process and they don't try to ram their beliefs down my throat, they can believe there's a deistic sandworm in the sky that's going to devour the entire human race one day, for all i care. i don't know precisely what i believe in anymore. but i believe there's something more than us. more than this, right here, right now. these people, though...they claim to have a direct audience with god whenever they want it. and wouldn't you know, it's not just one-way traffic. god isn't just the best listener in the universe; he talks back too. "god has told me if you call in right now and charge exactly $273 dollars to your credit card, he will provide you with a miracle! marriages will be saved! finances will be restored! lives will be changed! you're planting a seed. i can't plant the seed for you. you're planting a seed, and your faith is going to harvest that seed, through the power of god. pick up the phone right now, and prove your faith, and god will deliver a miracle. there's a woman watching right now. she's having problems in her marriage. she's about to lose her house. she thinks god has abandoned her. but god is merely waiting for her to plant a seed. and the miracle he's offering in return for that seed is only available for the next half hour, for $273. that's a small price to pay for what god is promising you." so all this time, all i had to do was send a fixed amount of money to a stranger, and i would have been granted a miracle? shit. what have i been waiting for? i've wasted my whole goddamn life trying to make things happen on my own steam, when there was no need. oh...sorry god. s'pose you wouldn't want to give me a miracle now, after i took your name in vain and all. con artists promising miracles in exchange for cash. that's what these people are. some of them are just more charismatic than others. they get desperate people to buy the hot air they're spewing about a god who would strike them down in a second if he was really a masculine deity, and they laugh all the way to the bank while these poor, gullible people sit around waiting for their miracles to show up. how is this legal? that's what i'd like to know. 'cause to me, it doesn't seem too far removed from extortion. and appropriating and misrepresenting god's image for selfish, nefarious purposes...isn't that getting perilously close to slander? you'd think he would have sued at some point. then again, maybe i shouldn't even be blathing this. maybe i should be planting a seed. it's only $273. a nice odd number like that is bound to buy me a pretty decent miracle. don't you think? 130318 ... raze i just had the clearest thought: it's all a ponzi scheme, dressed up in religious clothes. but maybe i only say that because if god started speaking to me directly and told me to give him all my money, i wouldn't go on television and talk about it in an effort to get others to do the same, with me supposedly acting as the go-between. i'd call the police to report a holy mugging. 130903 ... raze a gem overheard the last time i was on vampire hours: "sow an uncommon seed and trust in god for an uncommon harvest." which is a real pretty way of saying, "send us more money than you can afford, and pray with everything you've got for a divine fluke to reimburse you." 141110 what's it to you? who go blather from